It’s the wrap up podcast for our What’s Killing Women’s Libido series!

At the end of the month we like to record a podcast that’s a little more aimed at men, and today we thought we’d wrap up what can cause women’s libidos to plummet–and what men can do about it!

Because it isn’t always men’s fault (in fact, it’s often not). But guys can still be a big part of the solution. And if libido differences are a huge issue in your marriage, it doesn’t mean that there’s nothing that can be done.

Asking the hard questions can really help!

So listen in.

Or, as always, you can watch on YouTube:


Timeline of the Podcast

0:10 ‘Boost Your Libido’ has been revamped!
2:15 What is killing women’s libido?
8:40 Orgasm gap
11:45 Brakes and accelerators
18:15 Health issues
23:40 Elora joins the podcast
39:15 Emotional closeness
49:45 What has happened over the years in marriage?
52:10 Can she say ‘no’?
1:00:30 Don’t forget Boost Your Libido launch prices!

Main Segment: What’s Killing Women’s Libido?

Keith and I started with the five things that, if present, make frequency pretty much take care of itself:

Five Things That Affect Frequency

  1. High marital satisfaction
  2. Women’s consistent orgasm
  3. Feeling emotionally close during sex
  4. No porn use
  5. No sexual dysfunction

We looked at them one by one, using lots of letters from readers, to see how this may play out. We showed how one guy was trying to help his wife with what sounds like a classic case of vaginismus–but that’s really something that needs a pelvic floor physiotherapist. We talked a bit about porn (and I read an excerpt from The Great Sex Rescue!).



Are you TIRED of always being too tired for sex?

Do you yearn to actually WANT to make love--and figure out what all the fuss is about?

There is a way! In this 10-module recently revamped Boost Your Libido course I take you through what libido is (it may surprise you!), what affects libido, and how we can reclaim the excitement that God made us for.

Course totally revamped in summer 2022!

But we also looked at how what we believe about sex can impact libido. And for that we had a special guest.

Elora Dodd from Online1RoomSchoolhouse joined us!

Elora is a comedian on TikTok and Instagram, and dozens of people sent me some hilarious videos she did a while ago about the main plot about sex in women’s books vs. men’s books. They were just so darn funny I had to have her on to talk about her take.

She created a new one just for the show (we couldn’t run her originals on the podcast because of copyrighted music that can only be used on those platforms), and I’m very grateful! You won’t want to miss this. It’s hilarious.

But she also shared with us what it was like growing up as an autistic teen who tends to take things literally hearing all the purity culture messages. Very confusing.

Things Mentioned in This Podcast:


What's Killing Libido for Women?
Sheila Wray Gregoire

Sheila Wray Gregoire

Founder of To Love, Honor and Vacuum

Sheila is determined to help Christians find BIBLICAL, HEALTHY, EVIDENCE-BASED help for their marriage. And in doing so, she's turning the evangelical world on its head, challenging many of the toxic teachings, especially in her newest book The Great Sex Rescue. She’s an award-winning author of 8 books and a sought-after speaker. With her humorous, no-nonsense approach, Sheila works with her husband Keith and daughter Rebecca to create podcasts and courses to help couples find true intimacy. Plus she knits. All the time. ENTJ, straight 8

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