If I were going to make a marriage app for couples to spice up their marriage, what would I focus on?
I’ve often wondered that. I’ve thought about how I’d encourage fun “games” where couples get challenges to do more foreplay, but in a fun way, that helps them explore each other’s bodies and figure out what feels good.
I’d try to do something that would break up the routine that we too often get into, so that we can feel fun and flirty again.
I’d design something that would let couples talk about what they’re comfortable doing–and what they’re not. And have an easy way to suggest new things to try that don’t make anyone feel pressured, but instead feel excited!
I’d include info that would help people learn some basic stuff about sex and anatomy that they may have missed (and last month’s series on libido, and how many women just aren’t receiving pleasure from sex, shows that this is really needed!)
I’d make sure that app wasn’t crass, or gross, or focusing on sex toys or porn or weird role playing or anything like that.
And I’d include lots of fun ways for couples to feel more emotionally connected, too, because without the emotional connection, sex is empty.
Thankfully, I don’t have to create that app, a fun & sexy app has already been made!
And thank you to Intimately Us for sponsoring this post!
Intimately Us is a fun & sexy app that helps couples prioritize sex and bring passion back to their marriage.
So many of us want a passionate sex life, but we don’t know how to get there. We don’t know how to start those conversations. We don’t know how to get out of the rut. We don’t know how to tell our partner we want more foreplay, new positions, or just more romance!
But the Intimate Us app makes all of that easy–and fun!
Try new things in a fun, pressure-free way with the app’s sexy games for couples!
First up on the menu is the “Play” section–and this section’s fun!
Brainstorming new things and exploring what feels good can be awkward. Even just the idea of trying new things is daunting–where do you start?! Is it going to be embarrassing? Is my spouse going to like my ideas or not?
That’s where the games come in.
First of all, before each game you can go and turn off anything you’re personally not comfortable with. Don’t want any prompts including oral sex, the shower, or blindfolds? Simply turn it off! Then, when you’ve selected your comfort settings, you can simply follow the prompts for some spicy fun! And since the app is the one suggesting what you’re doing, you don’t need to spend a ton of time trying to brainstorm new things to try–it’s all done for you.
And once you figure out what you like, you can create your own foreplay ideas list, just for you!
The Intimately Us free game comes with some great ideas to launch you into sex–but the spicier stuff is reserved for the paid version. Roll the dice, and then you land on a square, and receive a prompt. The early prompts just help you talk and connect, like this:
Later prompts get you to start disrobing:
And then the steamier prompts build you towards sex tonight! Here’s a Chili Level 3, but I’m not going to show you higher than that because it’s just, well, weird with our names there!
With all the options, you can either skip if you don’t like it, and choose something else, or you can hit the chili pepper if you want to get to the steamier stuff more quickly!
And that’s not the only game. There’s also “Let’s Get It On”, “Talk Me Into It”, and “Pleasure Island“.
With each game, you have two choices: Play it where the app roles a dice and your card appears, or play it where you’re given three ideas, and you can pick one for your spouse to do, and discard one that you really don’t like, taking turns. The paid version opens this up to endless possibilities! (here’s just a tame foreplay one, but they get much steamier):
What’s great about this game is that YOU choose–but you’re still pushed to be a little adventurous.
You have three choices, and you do need to choose one. But you can stick to what you’re comfortable with–and discard what you’re not.
The app is not about turning you into someone you’re not. It’s allowing who YOU are to come out!
That’s really the aim of the app–encouraging you to have fun and try things, but keeping you safe, relaxed, and not feeling pressured or pushed. Your relationship, your intimacy, is at the forefront.
It’s not about pushing your comfort zones as much as building your sexual confidence and fun!
And you can build that confidence with other fun things, like Battlestrip, creating your own foreplay routine, or even sending sexy invite texts. They have a whole bunch of them, and you just choose one and message it to your spouse!
Next up is the Discover section–because Intimately Us is personal to YOU.
Yes, it’s an app that helps you spice things up and have better sex. But it doesn’t end there because the creators of Intimately Us understand that great sex starts with a great marriage. The “Discover” section is focused on building intimacy, with conversation starters, a platform to discuss sexual boundaries, date ideas, and more.
This is one of the big things that sets it apart from other apps in its genre–the ability to personalize it so much to you and your marriage.
And the Sexplorations List is an awesome addition I may write more about, because I like it so much. It has a bunch of questions where you answer yes, no, or maybe, and can add a note–so that your spouse understands you better. It’s your chance to explain why you don’t like to be groped (or why you do!).
Do you like euphemisms for body parts or to use specific words? The app lets you choose. And the prompts to have conversations about your comfort level, what things you’d like to try, or what are your big turn-ons and turn-offs mean that this isn’t just a generic sex check-list app, but a chance to develop intimacy. And that leads us to the next section:
The Intimately Us app was created to help you connect with your spouse in whole new ways–in the bedroom and out of it.
Take time creating a bucket list of things you want to try, and even set up reminders for each other to help you affirm your spouse the way they say will mean the most to them! The “Dream” section also includes a chance to write out fantasies you have had, type out intimate memories you have had with your spouse (sexual or not), and even list all those little things you love about each other.
The Intimately Us app is fantastic for couples who don’t want to just try new things, but want to actually get better at sex.
Next up: Learn!
Not only are you given lists of hundreds of new things to try and games to spice things up, but Intimately Us has an extensive “learn” section to teach you how to improve sexual technique, how to increase mutual pleasure, and how to try new things if you haven’t done them before. Many of the lessons start easy and amp up as you feel more confident, so if you’re a bit daunted by things like manual stimulation or oral sex or if you just want to figure out how to get better at those types of acts without having to google it, this is a great resource for you.
(And seriously, who wants to Google that stuff? Get the app instead!)
One of the features I love best is the Sex Life Checkup. It’s 40 questions you talk through (not all at once!) on things like arousal and desire, routine and ruts, sexual health, and more. Sometimes it’s easier to talk about things when YOU’RE not the one asking the question–the app is!
Both Rebecca and I had a chance to talk to Daniel, who created the app, and try it out, before it went live. We loved his vision for helping couples discover their sexual preferences and confidence and being able to talk with each other about things, without getting crass or gross. And we love that he lets you toggle OFF anything from the very beginning that you’re just not okay with.
It really is an app that’s focused on YOU and your marriage. I’ve only scratched the surface in this post–there’s so much to discover (and do! 🙂 ).
And “Fun” and “Sexy” should be two words that fit your marriage.
If they’re not–what if they can be? What if you could receive prompts during the day of things to text your spouse to build them up (and flirt of course!)? What if you could discover what really turns your spouse on, and open up exploration in a relaxed but exciting way?
What if tomorrow night, instead of wondering if sex was just going to be five minutes long and leave you hanging, you could know that you’d be playing a game that would ramp up sex, encourage foreplay, and actually let you feel closer and learn about each other?
P.S.: Can I just say how much I love the fact that an app like this exists?
An app that isn’t crass. An app that doesn’t just try to get you to do whatever your spouse wants you to do, even if it makes you uncomfortable. An app that doesn’t try to fit sex into any particular mold.
Instead, it’s an app that’s focused on YOU. An app that understands that sex is really an expression of the intimacy you already share, and sex should flow out of that.
An app that isn’t awkward, but instead is empowering.
You were meant to feel sexy. You were meant to be sexually confident. And if you have trouble being assertive, asking for what you want, figuring out what feels good–well, often that’s so much easier when a prompt is telling you what to try.
So try it out! I honestly can’t recommend it enough.