My wedding night was a big disaster.
Sex hurt; it was awkward; and I felt so guilty about it that I rushed things when we really should have slowed down.
Before I was married I was given a book that was all about how to reach orgasm on your wedding night. It was all, “touch here for 8 minutes, and rub here 237 times…” and so on and so on. It made me a nervous wreck.
And, obviously, it didn’t work.
When I wrote The Good Girl’s Guide to Great Sex, I surveyed thousands of women to find out if it was just me. Did everyone else have great sex?
Nope. Now, about 20% of people really did have an amazing time. Another 20% didn’t even consummate because they were exhausted; they had their period; or sex hurt too much. And then the other 60%? It was just kinda meh.
Follow all those people for about 10 years, though, and we tend to even out.
So here’s what I was wondering: Is there a way to short-circuit that and avoid the disappointment and awkwardness? Are there better ways to prepare for your honeymoon–and your marriage–that make it much more likely you’ll be relaxed, you’ll enjoy being sexual, and you’ll have a great time on your trip?
That’s what my new Honeymoon Course is for! Rebecca and I have been working on this for a while, and it’s all ready to go today.
The Honeymoon Course walks engaged couples through two big things:
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How to prepare for a great sex life once you’re married
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And how to plan the honeymoon trip that suits your budget, your timeline, and your preferences.
Featuring videos, audio downloads, activities, checklists, packing lists, and more, the course is everything couples need to jump into marriage.
This course is great for virgins who are unclear what sex is going to be like–and worried that they’re going to do something wrong, and great for couples who may have had past partners, but want a fresh start now that they’re getting married.
Get ready to start your marriage with a bang with The Honeymoon Course’s Sex Modules:
- What sex is: a complete Sex Ed for adults
- The 2 common problems that couples get into with sex (and what to do now to minimize their impact)
- How to deal with past baggage–whether it’s porn, sex abuse, past partners, or general shame about sex–and how to get a clean slate
- Help for choosing the best form of contraception for you (or how to plan for sex if you’d like to embrace natural family planning)
- And best of all, the ONE MINDSHIFT that makes honeymoon sex so much better!
And plan the perfect honeymoon for YOU with our Honeymoon Planner:
- Choose which of the 5 basic honeymoon types best matches your budget, timeline, personalities, and more
- Decide what the aim of your honeymoon is–and make sure you’ve planned the right one to achieve it
- Avoid the common travel mistakes that leave people exhausted and grumpy
- Make the most of your wedding night (or the few days afterwards!)
- And rest assured that you won’t forget anything important with our checklists and packing lists.
Plus we’ve got activities to do on your honeymoon to make memories and help transition to husband and wife!
(We’ve even got 5 new sexy dares for you!
No one wants to pay $500 for the honeymoon suite, only to arrive from the reception, exhausted, at midnight, and then have to leave at 6:30 the next morning to catch a flight.
No one wants to tour the Colisseum in Rome, and instead of enjoying the sites, feel grumpy because travel has been stressful and you’re prickly with each other because sex isn’t going well.
And no one wants to sit in a cabin in the woods for a week and wind up bored because no one told you you can’t actually have sex for 24 hours straight.
And no one wants to find out belatedly WHY it’s important to pee after sex, or end up in the emergency room because you didn’t know you can’t use Vaseline as lubricant (it happens!).
Most of all, though, I want people’s transition to married sex to be easy and intimate, with as little pressure as possible.
After over a decade on this blog, I’ve read so much about other people’s stories about how sex got off to a rough start. And I’ve compiled the advice that I wish I could have given these couples beforehand–and that I wish someone had given me.
It would have stopped me from feeling guilty. It would have stopped me from rushing. Most of all, it would have helped me relax enough to figure out how to feel aroused. And that would have started things off much better!
Even if sex isn’t new, though, married sex is. And making that transition when you’re navigating baggage can be tricky. So the course also takes you through how to deal with that baggage, including how to talk to your fiance about things that you may not have opened up about yet. And I’ll take you through how to make sex new once you’re married to the one you love!
The course has:
5 Modules
Covering starting with a clean slate, sex ed for adults, planning for honeymoon sex, planning the perfect honeymoon, and honeymoon activities.
12 Lessons
Lessons come in both video and audio format–so you can download if you’d rather listen on the go!
12 Planning Activities
Including couples’ challenges, checklists, packing lists, discussion questions, and more
5 Honeymoon Activities
Lists of fun things to do on your honeymoon, plus 5 sexy dares!
Plus we’ve got information Sheets, including contraception information, hygiene practices to keep sex healthy, when to see the doctor, and more.
The Honeymoon Course also makes a great bridal shower gift!
Pair it with The Good Girl’s Guide to Great Sex, and you can bless a young bride. Reply to the receipt email after purchase and we’ll send you a great coupon explaining the course to put inside a card for the bride (or the groom!).
I’m honestly so proud of The Honeymoon Course.
I was praying all day yesterday about how I hope that people will pick it up, work through it–and then just start their marriages off much more relaxed and equipped than I did. And I hope that we can prevent many of the issues that have brought people to this blog in the first place.
“Get ready to start your marriage with a bang”
Was that double entendre intentional?! 😂
Funny story about that: When I was trying to come up with the tagline, that’s all I could think of. I kept saying to Rebecca, “we can’t use that!” But I put it out on Twitter, and people thought it was hilarious.
I didn’t want to use it, but I CAN’T THINK OF ANYTHING ELSE NOW. It’s totally and completely in my brain. 🙂 And sometimes it still comes out. I’d really like a better tagline, though… 🙂
Is this exclusively for brides to be? There should be some sort of resource for men about to be married, especially about managing expectations etc.
Great question! It’s for the couple to do together. I’ll make that clearer in the post!
And, yes, it talks about managing expectations, but also about what the real aim for honeymoon sex should be if you want to set yourself up for great married sex.
Yay! Sounds exciting. I’ll make sure to pass it around because i have tons of siblings and friends who are either single or engaged. So there will be LOTS of weddings around me. And i’ll defiantly buy it when i get engaged.