Can we appreciate the small things?
I’m sitting in our RV right now, typing this. We’re sitting by a small, manmade lake in Jacksonville, Florida, surrounded by a bunch of snowbirds (those are mostly Canadians and northern US retirees who come down to Florida for the winter), plus a bunch of actual birds that Keith is having fun photographing. We’re here for just a week, because I’m giving a Girl Talk tonight at New Berlin Road Church. Then we’re off to Louisiana, where I’m speaking on February 16 at Christ Community Church in Lake Charles.
One thing that I always come away with after living in our RV for an extended period of time is how little I actually need.
I have my knitting (I’m knitting a big blanket for our bed, and it’s my RV project that’s lasted a few years); we have some games that we play; Keith does our accounting and edits his bird pictures. And we’re happy.
When the kids were little, some of the happiest times we had were in our little 30-year-old tent trailer camper, playing board games and having hot chocolate.
You have so few clothes, so few possessions, and life really is just about being together. Sure you have to cook and clean, but you don’t have much, so cleaning doesn’t take long. You have to do laundry, sure, but it’s not that much work. And we’re really perfectly happy. I’m always a little disappointed when we get home and I have to live in my house again.
I think one of the key things to life in the RV is that we’re not streaming Netflix. The internet isn’t good enough to support streaming, so we actually have to spend time together. So we play games, and we do our hobbies, and we talk.
Couples come to me with all kinds of questions and problems in their marriage, and they wonder where to start. How do you start to disentangle such complicated issues and hurts, when there have been layer up on layer of misunderstandings and problems?
And I invariably say the same thing: Start spending time together first. Start just doing something that you both enjoy. Start doing something fun so that you just chat.
When you lose the ability to talk about small things, then you lose the ability to talk about big things.
We can’t tackle big problems if we can’t just chat and laugh. To tackle big things, you need goodwill to draw on. And for that, you need some chatting!
That’s what we get when all is stripped away and we’re living in a 24-foot long camper, with a bed where I need to climb over Keith to get into or out of. Sometimes less complicated is better.
I’ve talked this month about how many of us are spending our lives on things that don’t ultimately satisfy. They fill up our time (like video games), but they don’t feed our souls or our relationships. Or maybe we’re not doing the things that we need to do to live good lives (like getting healthy). And instead of feeding good relationships, we’re feeding selfishness (like my post on how we shouldn’t damage our kids by feeding thoughts about resenting parenting). Next month we’re going to move on to how to spice things up and have fun in bed, but before we do that, let’s get back to basics!
I just want to encourage everyone to have some downtime with each other, with some of the modern trappings pushed aside. Play a game. Do a hobby. Take a walk. Make this a regular thing. It’s not hard. It doesn’t take that much time. But it reaps such big dividends in your lives!
The older I get, the more I believe in the power of board games.
I’m going to be doing a series of posts this year on some of the best, most fun board games I’ve come across. My kids like board games. My assistants on the blog love board games. Tammy, my right hand manager, always gives board games as wedding presents. They’re fun. You can play them with children (starting around age 6 or 7). And it gets us away from screens and talking to each other again!
I remember the board game nights we have as a family. I remember the date nights we go out to pubs with the game Hive. I rarely remember the times we spend watching a TV show together.
So I hope this year to spread some of that enthusiasm to you all! The power of a board game is the power of chatting and laughing. And it does matter!
What games do you love? Let’s talk in the comments!
Fun post!! I agree!! We have gotten back to game nights. One for us and 1-2 a week with the kids.
My husband and I like cribbage. Or card games. It really is a boost for your marriage to compete and talk together! We read the 2 player game post awhile back and were challenged to do it. 😁
Last night we played Dicecapades with the boys. I found it for $3 at a thrift store and it is a blast!!
We also have Hive. It is fun and different!
Thank you for the great blogs and fun ideas!!!
Awesome, Emma! I find that when the kids come home with their spouses, games are just a great way to connect. And whenever we have people over for dinner we tend to play a game afterwards, too. People with all different personalities and interests can still join in and feel like we’re all a part of something.
We like Uno, Monopoly, and Andy Griffith mania trivia game. We garage sale the 10 commandments game it’s kinda like Monopoly but your learning about the 10 commandments. We also have animalopoly.
Totally don’t know the 10 Commandments game! I’ll have to check it out!
We play games a couple of times a week with another couple. My husband’s first choice is always Settlers of Catan with the Cities and Knights expansion, but we play plenty of other games, too. Every once in awhile, we take Ticket to Ride or another game with us to a cafe and get just one cup of coffee each and sit there playing games for a couple of hours. We’re always up for a new game!
My husband and I, as well as our four children, sold our house in the summer of 2017 and bought a 33’ fifth wheel (right before kid number four was born!). We’ve been living the tiny life for over a year now, and it really does give you a lot more time to live because there is so much less to maintain. We don’t travel, we are behind my parents house, so the older kids can play on the yard when they’re done with homeschool. Someday I’m sure we will buy another house, but for right now I’m loving this life.
It never cease to amaze me how marriage improves the physical looks of men. Don’t get offended Sheila, but i have noticed that every man who’s married looks much better than when he was single. Studies have even shown, married men live longer, make more money, are healthier and have better sex, than their single counter parts. I see this around me ALL THE TIME! The men i once thought were average looking at best when they were young, my word, they turn into handsome creatures after marriage. Truly, women are a good thing for men. God was correct when he declared, “it’s not good for man to be alone.” Adam probably looked much better once Eve came about. Ha! 🙂
My whole family loves games. Our favorites are Dutch blitz and Pit, both fast playing card games. Pit can get pretty loud in a group! Early in marriage we played chess or Risk, but my husband was so competitive I rarely enjoyed it. The card games with all of us are fun though.
Oh, I totally agree! My husband and I were laughing about that last night. He really does get better looking with age (and with me around!)
For just the two of us we enjoy Seven Wonders Duel and Ticket to Ride Scandinavia. We also just got a game called Shadows in the Forest that you play in the dark. It’s like a board game version of flashlight tag. We have played it just us or with our young kids.
We love Seven Wonders Duel, too!