What do you do if foreplay actually hurts–the guy I mean?

Yep, here at To Love, Honor and Vacuum, we tackle every kind of sex question imaginable. And today, for my Ask Sheila video, I thought I’d tackle this one (and with many thanks to the Ultimate Intimacy app for sponsoring this post–and to those of you who have replied to my Instagram stories about it with quite funny memes):

Reader Question

I just finished The Good Girl’s Guide to Great Sex and loved it. The biggest thing I gained from your book was simply that physical intimacy is a huge part of marriage and I need to focus on it. As a result, my husband and I have been intimate much more lately. This past week was the first time we achieved intimacy 4 times in a week (we’ve been married for 8.5 years). This was a huge success for us and the success is filtering into other areas of our relationship because of it. However, one problem we’ve had is that my husband has significant pain in his wrist from clitoral stimulation. And because of the increase in frequency, the pain is worse. Do you have any practical suggestions for this problem? I should say that I am 7 months pregnant, so I know that one suggestion might be to try to find ways to orgasm during intercourse, but this probably isn’t the best time to take that on as positions are currently a bit limited 🙂 Thank you so much!!

Here’s my response:

Great question! Some other posts to help about foreplay:

Foreplay is awesome–but it’s also better if she can get more active so that he isn’t just doing a repetitive motion. So go try those other things!

And also–one more thing about The Ultimate Intimacy app. The reader mentioned in the question that she was finding other positions difficult because of pregnancy, but the app has over 200 positions–and you can search for them based on criteria (like being pregnant!) So it’s a good way of finding other things that can feel good. 🙂

Ultimate Intimacy App for Married Couples: Different Sex Positions

The Ultimate Intimacy App It really can help you make things a lot more fun–and make foreplay more fun because you switch it up, and you’re not doing those repetitive motions too long. 🙂

Check out my post about the app, or get it on Google Play or iTunes.

What do you do if you love foreplay but it's hurting your husband? Here are ideas for foreplay so you and your spouse can still have fun intimacy!


And now let me ask you: any tips for foreplay so it doesn’t get repetitive? Let’s talk in the comments!

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