Does how we keep our houses affect our marriages?
Short answer: yes. But that doesn’t mean that we all need to have Pinterest-perfect homes that are expertly curated to our personal style. Kathi’s here today with some easy and practical tips for how to start the decluttering journey.
She’s got some great stuff to say. Here’s Kathi!
When I talk to women about what they want to improve in their lives, so many say something along these lines: “I want to focus on my husband this year. And I want to finally get organized. And lose weight!”
OK – so I may not be able to help you with the weight thing. But what if told you that you could improve both your marriage and your home at the same time?
It turns out that the state of our clutter and the state of our marriage could be more closely tied than we ever imagined.
In my book Clutter Free: Quick and Easy Steps to Simplifying Your Space I site a study from researchers at UCLA’s Center on Everyday Lives and Families (CELF) that looked at the relationship between thirty-two California families and the thousands of objects in their homes.
To the surprise of no woman reading this, clutter has a profound effect on our mood and self-esteem. CELF’s scientists found a link between high cortisol (stress hormone,) levels in female home owners and a high density of household objects. In other words: “The more stuff, the more stress. #clutterfree”
And we all know, if I’m not happy, that is going to have a profound affect on my marriage- and my husband.
There are some areas of your marriage where it takes two to pull off a big relationship boost – but when it comes to clutter, one person can make a huge difference.
If you are just starting this decluttering journey, let me tell you the two areas to concentrate on right now:
1. The space that you greets you when you come home.
My hope for every couple is that their home is a haven for your marriage. I want you and your man to walk into your house after a long day fighting the battles of the world, and land in a soft place – your home.
But that only works if you don’t have chaos and distraction greeting you as you hit the door.
Wherever your first glimpse of home is at the end of the day, make sure that is rises up to greet you. Remove the junk. Fluff the pillows. Have a diffuser on a timer that goes off ten minutes before you come home. Make home something you look forward to walking into.
2. Your bedroom.
If your home is your haven, I want your bedroom to be your nest. That place that blocks out everything from the world and is all about you and your man. That’s hard to do when you have to unbury your bed every time you want to cuddle up.
If you only have time to declutter a couple of areas, these are the two places you’ll want to concentrate on. (And if your “Mount Fold Me” is on his – our your – favorite chair, make that a priority as well.)
Make it your mission to create a home that is a haven for your marriage. What routines have you found help make your home a haven? Share them in the comments below!
Sex is supposed to be stupendous--physically, emotionally, AND spiritually. If it's not, get The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex--and find out what you've been missing.