Are you ready to create outfits that work for you?
We’ve been talking all week about how to fight the frump, covering hair, natural-looking makeup, and finding clothes that fit and flatter.
Now we’re going to bring it all together by talking about that final, put together look.
So let’s go back to Monday for a moment. Remember how I got dressed and it took 45 seconds, vs. 30 seconds in the ugly outfit? My point was that it didn’t take any longer to dress in something that looks good than something that looks terrible.
But I have a confession to make. I didn’t tell the whole story on Monday.
Here’s the truth: You can only get dressed fast if you know what you’re going to wear.
If you have to stand staring at your clothes every morning in utter confusion, wondering what to wear and what will look good together, then getting dressed and fighting the frump will take far too much time.
So I want to share with you my secret about what I do every month.
I talked about it last year when I wrote about my capsule wardrobe, and I want to come back to that today.
Here’s what a capsule wardrobe is, in a nutshell: you decide to dress with just a few pieces in your closet–many people choose 40–that are made up of neutrals and then some colours that coordinate, so that with just a few pieces you can create multiple outfits and looks.
Then you try to make sure that each of those pieces is high quality and can do double duty, in different outfits with different looks.
I cheat a bit with my capsule wardrobe. I haven’t gotten rid of all my clothes except for 40. But what I do is at the beginning of the month I choose 25 that I want to wear that month. And then I store them in my closet in ready-made outfits.
What will a capsule wardrobe of 25 pieces look like? First, decide on your neutrals. Neutrals tend to be: black, grey, brown, navy, beige, or khaki. Those are colours that you can tend to layer with prints or patterns, and they’ll still look good. I used to use black all the time in my wardrobe, but black honestly doesn’t suit me. So now I tend towards browns and greys.
Then, once you’ve decided on your neutrals, you choose some bright coloured or patterned pieces to add to it.
Here, for example, is a sample 25 item capsule wardrobe:
Capsule Wardrobe
Neutral colour 1: (Khaki)
1 casual pant
1 dress pant
1 long sleeve shirt
1 short sleeve shirt
1 blazer/jacket
Neutral colour 2: (brown)
1 long sleeve shirt
1 short sleeve shirt
1 skirt
Neutral Extras: (Solid Colours)
2 jeans
1 blazer/jacket (blue)
1 sweater (other)
Add colours:
6 tops
1 vest
1 dress
2 sweaters
3 T-shirts
Once you’ve done all that, you can accent them all with purses, belts, scarves and necklaces. Even shoes! (Although it’s getting to be winter where I live, so it’s really all about the boots right now!)
Accents end up making the outfit
I took Kelly Snyder’s Adore Your Wardrobe course last year and she explained the awesome “Rule of 4” which has helped me create outfits! Basically, you have to be able to count to at least 4 when you’re getting dressed to feel like you’re dressed in an actual outfit.
So how do you get to 4? Neutral pants and plain coloured shirts count as 0. A pattern on either a top or a bottom counts as 1. A sweater or blazer is another 1. A big necklace, a belt, a scarf, or a brooch are all 1. So you can get to 4 with jeans, a t-shirt, a funky sweater, a big belt, and a necklace. Or you can get to 4 with jeans, a patterned shirt, a plain sweater, and a big necklace.
Here, for example, are some outfits I’ve got:
Casual Shirt with a scarf–Accent belt not shown
But here’s another way I’d wear that same shirt (again, the accent belt isn’t shown):
Or you can throw in one of your patterned shirts!
Patterned shirt with bold necklace and sweater
I also like to pick one or two pieces that I love but don’t wear that much–like some of my handknits–and throw them in each month. This week I’m focusing on a tank top that I knit (seen here) and a vest that I knit (seen in my makeup post!) I’ve figured out different ways to wear it:
Dressing up the tank with a purple leather jacket
Making the tank more casual with a flowy sweater
And, of course, I try to throw in at least one skirt and dress to try to encourage myself to wear them more often (and I’m stocking up on fleece-lined tights to make them more comfortable in Canada’s fall!)
Fun comfy sweater over a skirt, bold bracelet not shown
I know it can be hard when you have little kids to wear necklaces (I remember those days! My kids kept pulling them!). So those may not be good fashion choices for you at that stage of your life. And scarves that kids can spit up on are likely bad choices, too. But a few big bracelets or some cool belts can do wonders!
Add Accents to Your Tops–and store them that way
What I do, then, is I choose my 25 pieces, and then I choose a bunch of necklaces and scarves that coordinate and I store those necklaces and scarves on the same hanger as the top I may wear them with. I store my belts on the same hanger as the jeans or skirts or dresses I may wear them with.
And I take my whole capsule wardrobe–including jeans and t-shirts–and put them on hangers on one shelf on my closet for that month, so that I can see everything at a glance.
If your closet isn’t big enough for that, use a drawer! Choose one drawer that is just for your capsule wardrobe items, and store them folded so that you can see them at a glance when you open the drawer, like this:
But you’ll find if you spend 20-30 minutes at the beginning of each month choosing some items of clothing to concentrate on, then you can think about what you’d like to pair with it and create outfits, so you don’t have to think each day! And you’ll know that if you pick a shirt with a necklace or scarf, you’ll also have a sweater or skirt or pants that will coordinate, and you can mix and match.
I sometimes plan a whole capsule wardrobe around one item: sometimes a silk scarf I love but hardly ever wear (I’ll choose things that coordinate with it) or something I knit that I haven’t worn in a while. And that way I find myself happier with my wardrobe and wearing more pieces, rather than sticking to the easy ones!
Whew. There you go. Fight the Frump is done!
I hope you feel energized. I hope you feel like you CAN do this–like you can dress with confidence and get yourself ready to take on the world with just a few minutes each morning. It doesn’t have to be onerous. But it can make such a difference in how we see ourselves, and in how others see us!
So let’s keep this going. Create that wardrobe, make some outfits, and let’s see you shine this month before Christmas!
Let’s encourage each other and fight the frump together!
Fight the Frump: Finding an Easy Hairstyle
Sheila Wray Gregoire has been married for 27 years and happily married for 22! She loves traveling around North America with her hubby in their RV, giving her signature "Girl Talk" about sex and marriage. And she's written 8 books. About sex and marriage. See a theme here? Plus she knits. Even in line at the grocery store.
Marriage isn't supposed to be blah!
Sex is supposed to be stupendous--physically, emotionally, AND spiritually. If it's not, get The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex--and find out what you've been missing.
Yeah, you ought to cover shoes. No one wants to see your grandmas 1970s clogs that you inherited when she died. Especially not 6 days a week. Even if they are comfortable. Same with sneakers.
If you are married and the only time you wear something even remotely attractive (or heck, sexy) is for church, it might be time to rethink that. You don’t have to break out the 6 inch stilettos, but there’s gotta be something between them and those clogs.
I’ve loved the posts this week!
I already have a capsule wardrobe, though mine is smaller than yours. I have 3 pairs of nice jeans and 10 patterned tops, and 5 dresses. I rotate through the jeans and tops everyday but Sunday, when I wear the dresses.
I have about 10 pairs of shoes that I rotate through also.
It would be nice to have more clothes, but it just doesn’t fit in our budget. And I feel like I look put together when I add in a simple necklace and some makeup.
I love that, Carrie! I think if more people tried to live with fewer clothes, we would actually find it easier to look good, because we’d choose clothes that already can coordinate and make an outfit. Bravo for you to do well with that few items! I think that’s awesome.
I shared one of the posts earlier this week- about hair. One of my friends commented that her hubby doesn’t care how she looks and neither do her co-workers, so why bother looking nice. I told her to do or for herself. She has been dressing up, wearing makeup and got a new haircut. She said she’s gotten more compliments this week than she’s gotten the last few months. And she’s feeling great about herself!
Not going to lie, I’d probably score a 1 most days… and because I wear a sweater until it’s 25*C outside. Do double sweaters count for two points? How about mismatched socks? Loud patterned scrunchies?
Seriously though, this series was timely for me. I’m at home with my 3 month old daughter, I’ve always been inclined to just wear whatever is comfortable and minimize any shopping I have to do ever, and I have ZERO natural fashion sense… Three days this week I managed to brush my hair and put clothes on in the morning, and I weeded some old yucky clothes out of my closet. I’d have removed more but then there wouldn’t be enough to wear – I can go through several changes of clothes a day due to a messy baby! I’m going shopping tomorrow, and I’m armed with advice learned from the dress your truth course and this blog, so hopefully I end up enjoying what I’m wearing (for once!). It may not sound like much, but anyone who knows me would wonder what hit me. Baby steps, right?
Baby steps are great! And remember, too: you don’t have to buy an entirely new wardrobe! I always advise women to shop their closet first. Figure out what you already have that counts as a neutral pant or a good pair of jeans or a nice sweater. You may be surprised! A lot of things look sloppy when they pair them with any old T-shirt, but put them with a comfortable, shaped long sleeve Tshirt and suddenly they look really nice! Have an amazing time tomorrow–and don’t feel like you have to buy a ton! My daughter is working on a capsule wardrobe and she chooses one piece that she’s going to work towards, and she buys a nice quality one that will last a long time. So maybe it’s investing in a nice sweater in a neutral colour, or a patterned top that goes with a whole bunch of things you already have. So before you shop, check out what you have first! 🙂 And have fun!
You mention your daughter, does she have fashion blog also?
Lol. Love your comment! 🙂 Mismatched totally love things up. It’s great that you’re taking time to go shop for yourself. I hope you find something (s) you love.
How do you work the capsule wardrobe when the weather changes from record highs to record lows in the same week? (And the weather forecast can’t predict whether we will need warm clothes, rain gear, summer clothes next week, let alone when the month started! )
Also, how do you account for your moods on what color/texture/shape you want to wear? Personally, a lot of what I wear depends on my moods- some days are “cozy color” days, others are a little bit more “adventurous color” days. The same idea with form, pattern and texture. Often I think about what I want to wear while I’m in the shower, so I can dress quickly, but I can’t wrap my mind around a month in advance!
I can relate to not being able to decide things a month in advance! I guess it depends on the person. 🙂 I put my outfits together about 5-10 at a time, and I just try to make sure I vary them enough to where I have some diverse styles (a few skirt outifts, a few pants outfits, colorful, etc.) and both warm and cold weather outfits to choose from on a given day. I may not get through all of the outfits over the course of the week, but that’s okay.
Did you know that your different clothing choices are often tied to your hormone levels at the various phases of your menstrual cycle? You’re more likely to choose vibrant colors near ovulation (when you’re actively, though subconsciously, trying to be attractive) and will lean in to “cozy colors” or more comforting clothing as you approach menstruation. With this knowledge, you can actually plan ahead a little more than you might think, even if “planning ahead” is giving yourself a particular range of clothing for each phase of your cycle.
I think that I would go nuts trying to count to 4 because I love simplicity in clothes so much. Maybe I’ll start with 2 or 3 😉 Thanks for the series this week – I’ve really enjoyed it and it’s been encouraging me to dress better and at least attempt makeup, lol. My husband has asked me a couple times this week whether there was a special occasion I was dressing for. Mascara and earrings go farther than I realized!
I used to work outside the home for many years so I knew the importance of looking good on a dime; first it was for me and secondly it was the impression I wanted to give to others. People do make a judgement about you on appearance first. I know how to shop high low and tie things together and I love color – a pop of color does wonders for the spirit.
When you have nowhere to go, it seems hard to make the effort in how you present yourself. But I like the way I feel (honestly whether I’m frumpy or not) but it’s so much more fun when you wear things that make you feel good. All these tactics and strategies are nice, but you’ve got to know yourself.
Thank you so much for this series, Sheila! I definitely needed it as motivation to make an effort! It is so hard to get out of the ‘who cares?’ Mindset, but you are right that making an effort doesn’t actually take much time.
I need to work on clothes, I am actually waiting for a shipment of new casual tops that are bright and bold, I am excited to start wearing them!
The hardest thing for me clothes wise is that I really wear my clothes out. I have a physical outdoor job 3days/week, and the other days I am at home, cleaning, cooking, working with our animals etc. all things which are dirty work and hard on clothes! But I am going to try to incorporate some nicer things when I can – even if it’s just for the evenings when I get home from work and take off sweaty, dirty work clothes and put on so comfy, casual but nice clothes for the night.
I tend to buy a lot of tops with some kind of print or design because, honestly, I sweat a lot from my underarms and these hid that well. Paired with jeans and the right shoes, these can look dressy or casual.
In my closet, I hang things up on the outsides and pull clothes from the insides of my rack so that I know I haven’t worn the same things all week (or even too recently–I’d say I have about 15 tanks and 10 short- or long-sleeved shirts, so I really do have a lot to work with). That method works really well for me.
Last winter I wore the same three sweatshirts for basically 3 months because I was on crutches and needed something with a big pocket (hoodies did the trick). This winter, I’m determined to wear sweatshirts fewer times than once a week because I still remember how frumpy I felt last winter (even though I really couldn’t do anything about it). So far, so good!
This series came at the perfect time! I had read something similar a few years ago, but it was just about being ready for the day… ready to run out the door if needed. So I started to do my hair and makeup every day. But usually only wear hoodies and jeans. I recently went back to work at a salon and I needed to be put together 🙂 So then I would only ‘dress up’ for work or church….until today!!! I feel so much better about myself and am super motivated to go through my closet and get rid of most of the tshirts and pj pants :)Thanks so much Sheila for tackling all that you do to help us better ourselves and in turn our marriages!!!!!
Awesome! So glad you like it! And honestly–I really do find that if the necklaces and scarves and bracelets and belts are made into outfits ahead of time–getting dressed is super easy. I just put some forethought in at the beginning of the month! And then it’s so neat how little time it takes to get ready in the morning. 🙂
I love the 25 item idea. I’ve toyed with having a capsule wardrobe but could not seem to get rid of that much. This idea seems much more manageable. Thanks!
I cut out pictures of outfits that I like and glue them in a spiral. This does two things. First, I can just do the next picture for a put-together outfit. And second, I know what I need to add to my wardrobe based on what pictures I have that are missing pieces. If an item shows up several times, I know it will be a good purchase.