Yesterday was my birthday!
And some years on my birthday I write in-depth, useful posts, like how to make your birthday meaningful, or about dreaming new dreams.
Yesterday I shared 47 things you might not know about me. And today I thought I’d continue the birthday treatment by sharing something where the main message to me is “just don’t take yourself too seriously.”
And I thought I’d let you see the dangerous side of blogging and writing!
EXHIBIT A: The Seriously Dangerous Group Text Scenario
A little while ago I was looking over some of the earliest posts on this blog and debating whether I should rework them. I came across rather a funny anecdote in one to do with my daughter Katie when she was 11, and decided to text it to my daughters.
So I opened my messages app on my Mac, and I found the first text where I saw both of their heads.
And I texted them this message:
Now, Katie happened to be home the day I texted that. She was right upstairs in fact (I could have just called her downstairs and avoided texting altogether). And as soon as I hit send, she screamed.
“MOTHER!!!! What did you do?!?!?”
I didn’t understand what she as so upset about, until I looked at that group text–and realized that one of her best friends, who happens to be male, was ALSO in that particular group conversation.
He actually thought it was hilarious. Katie thought I was just insane.
But it reminded me of another instance–with another one of Katie’s friends.
EXHIBIT B: In Which I Text a Teenager By Accident
This one happened when I was writing the final edits for The Good Girl’s Guide to Great Sex.
It was due in at the publisher’s in the middle of a speaking tour in Alberta. I managed to finish it in time, but a few days later my editor got back to me to say that she’d like to see some of the “Good Girl’s Dares” that I’d offered to write: short little fun things that wives can do to spice things up.
Now it so happened that on the day she asked I also had two different columns due and a lot of travel time, and very little time in a hotel with a computer. So I decided to write them on my Blackberry in the car. I did, and later copied them and pasted them into an email on my Blackberry which I then sent to myself so I could edit them on my computer and send them off.
Now, my-then 2011 Blackberry was new and I hadn’t figured out how to lock it. It kept calling my husband by accident, for instance.
So here’s what happened just a few days later. My girls were in a Bible quizzing invitational tournament in upstate New York. We left early so we could meet up with some friends at a big mall, so the teenage girls could shop for a few hours before the competition. I took my friend Kathy’s cell number so I could text her when we got there and we could meet up. Which I did, as soon as we arrived.
Kathy then gave her cell phone to her 15-year-old daughter, and the five teenage girls (including my two) went off together, while Kathy and I explored.
An hour later I looked down at my cell phone only to see, to my horror, my list of rather explicit things wives could do to spice things up. It had been texted. To Kathy’s phone. Which our daughters had.
Somehow a combination of Kathy’s number being the last to be texted, and the text to my publisher being the last thing copied, made for a very dangerous combination.
When I realized what I had done, I yelled out for Kathy, and in horror explained what I had just sent her daughter. She took it much better than I did.
When we met up with the girls we got their take. I guess they read about five before they decided they had better stop. Rebecca figured it had something to do with my book and thought it was funny. Kathy’s daughter thought it was hilarious. The other mom with us wanted me to text it to her, too. But my youngest just said I had a dirty mind.
Let me reiterate: Bible quizzing. Teenage girls. Marriage sex dares. How do I get myself into these things?
Here are just a few:
Want to See More Good Girl Dares?

It’s a great book (my favourite I’ve ever written!) with everything about how to make sex great physically, emotionally, AND spiritually. And it has these gems sprinkled throughout!
Get your copy here. Because good girls do have more fun!
The moral of the story? Sometimes we just do seriously embarrassing things. Everyone else may think they’re hilarious, but they really are quite embarrassing. But you know what? Time goes on anyway. And the memories fade. And sometimes it’s just good to look back and laugh at yourself anyway!
Have you ever had a serious misstep with texting? Let me know in the comments!
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Just yesterday, I facebook-messaged a picture to my husband. And all of his family (aunts, uncles, parents, and siblings)! I did the same as you–saw his name and hit send. On Facebook, you can see who has read the message, and when I saw that Uncle Mike had read it, I realized my oopsie! Thankfully, it was a screenshot of some race results and nothing racy, but I did realized I’d better double-check before I send another message!
My favorite “oops” text came from a friend of mine…we were making plans to have dinner together & she sent me a text that made me laugh out loud: “why don’t you come over after sex”! I suggested she might want to proof read her speech-to-text messages before hitting send, because of course she meant “after 6” ?
Shelia – Happy Birthday to you. Last week I texted my wife “What does you sex schedule looked like?” Ha ha ha and at the time and she was showing our kids Elementary Principle pictures on her phone. If your phone is like ours, the text messages appears on the top margin of the phone briefly as it arrives….. To say the least my wife was not thrilled, and it certainly did not help my cause. I am still a work in progress. My response was well you should be happy your husband wants you…..Thats from your stuff…..she didn’t quite buy it….. I am all over the don’t take yourself so seriously thing. This is my motto for life. Laughter is the best medicine. I always appreciate that message. We did laugh about later after she scolded me. All this being said I wanted to ask you a question…. So I got into this space a few weeks ago and as result a friend of mine informed me that I was fearful. More directly – I was afraid of failure – Overall general failure of my life. This is addictive thinking that someone like me tends to find themselves in from time to time. So the question came to me – Well ok so I see the fear – how does one measure success in their life? Now I am not talking about looking back on your life. I am talking about the here and now. Interestingly enough, I thought about what you share on your site about yourself and your life to this point. It seems to me that it is measurably successful from working through your own issues to seeing how your kids have turned out as adults. I can run back through my life and see where I did good and where I screwed up etc. But how do I know if I am successful right now? How do i know I am not screwing it all up? This has been rolling around in my head for about a week now and it seems to tie into the recent post where you mentioned that you would ask Keith if he was going to leave you. Insecurity – fear etc. In my heart of hearts I know what I am doing for me and my wife and my family and my job and others is the best that I can do. I am trying my best with fumbles. Maybe this is just an odd question with no answer. Maybe I need to just man up and just say YES you are doing the best you can thats the measurement. Anyway, if you are able to answer this in some way I would appreciate it. I think I kind of know the answer yet I am stumped if that makes any sense. Thanks
After processing my thoughts on all this I came up with my own answer. FAITH. Thanks for letting me write out my thoughts here. I appreciate.
oh and welcome back – Rebeca kept me in line lol.
A f ew years ago, I was wanting to send a flirtatious text to my hubby “let’s leave the kids with friends and then we can have fun making dinner and whatever else that follows….” and as soon as I hit send, I realized my mistake!! I was trying to repare it when my boss replies, “ummmm you know I’m married and this isn’t your husband, riiiiigghhht??” I was sorta glad he couldn’t see my flaming face but it was slightly awkward the next day when I headed in to work!! 🙂
Oh, dear! That would be awful! 🙂
During a conference call I was sharing my screen, and accidentally switched to the chat program where with my wife we had been discussing plans for the evening… I switched away from it quickly, but still, there were small hearts and winking smileys and things like that 🙂 It is good that I can laugh about it now, that wasn’t the case for a while 🙂
I understand the struggle! I use two browsers, one for my fiction self and the other for HHH. I recently had to contact a fiction author friend and say, “Delete that comment!” because it linked to my sex blog. And twice I’ve accidentally tweeted from the wrong account and had to trash it immediately. This isn’t an identity issue so much as the fact that I currently write teen fiction. I really don’t want any of those readers popping over to hear my tips on what to do in bed. :p
That´s why a couple´s app is a great idea! Only you and your spouse on it, any photos taken in the app remain hidden from the phone/IPad´s memory etc. We used Avocado, but it sadly folded a few months ago. The only replacement we found was Between, but the design is way too childlike (and the privacy code not clear enough for me to be sure things won´t end up where they don´t belong), it´s impossible to get in couple´s mood. Any readers have tips?