We know that contentment is of God. But can there be times when discontentment is of God, too?
One of my goals in this last week, as the Boost Your Libido course launched, was to show people that we didn’t have to be content with blah marriages. God actually wants us to be passionate, and sometimes He stirs up discontentment in us to prod us into doing something about it.
The course launch is now over (although you can still buy the course any time! Just the special is over). And I’ve been blown away by how much interest there was in this course, and really humbled. Thank you.
I’ve decided I’m going to start working on more courses, so I’d love to know any ideas you have for what you’d like to see! Just put them in the comments. Here are three I’m thinking of: tell me which one I should start first (or give me another idea, too!).
- How to Make Sex Actually Feel Good (and even how to reach the Big O!)
- How to Recover as a Couple from a Porn Addiction
- How to Handle it when HE has No Sex Drive
I’d love some feedback!
During the launch, though, I wrote a post for Gary Thomas, the author of Sacred Marriage and his newest book, Cherish, that I really liked. And today I thought I’d give you a snippet of it and then link to it, so that you can read the rest.
Every night when I was a little girl, I would drift off to sleep dreaming of one day being married to a man who would make me feel safe. An only child of an amazing single mother, I still desperately needed to know that I was loved and that my life wouldn’t be uprooted again.
I wanted stability. I wanted, in Gary’s words, to be cherished.
I’ve been married for twenty-five years now, and I can attest with every fiber of my being that I am, indeed, very safe.
But I’ve also learned that safe isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. The reason that I’m happy with my husband today is not because I’m safe; the reason I’m happy with my husband is that together, we’re living an adventure.
Sometimes in our quest for safe we forget to live. We’re trying so hard to avoid anything bad that we forget to let the good in, too.
We know there’s such a thing as holy contentment–the sentiment that the Apostle Paul conveyed in Philippians 4:12:
I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.
I believe, though, that there’s also a thing called holy discontentment, even in our marriage. It doesn’t mean that we’re unhappy with our mate. It’s that we feel that we’re missing something important that God had for us. We know that He created us for more, and we’ve been settling. And we have a thirst for God’s passion to be more real in our lives, so that we stop playing it safe and start really living.
Nowhere do I see this as much in women’s experiences as in the area of sexual intimacy.
Read the rest of the post here! It’s an important one.
What’s #1 at To Love, Honor and Vacuum?
Valentine’s Day may be over, but that is no excuse to slow down in the love department! How can you show your husband you love him? In this week’s tops, we’ve got some great posts on ways to spend quality time with your hubby as well as how to keep the heat rising!
#1 Post on the Blog: 10 Ways To Make Sex Feel Great For Your Husband
#1 on the Blog Overall: 20 Two Person Games To Play With Your Husband
#1 from Facebook: 50 Shades Of Grey Is Bad For Your Marriage
#2 from Pinterest: 10 Ways To Crank Up The Heat In Your Marriage
What a Week!
I just wanted again to say thank you to everyone who ordered the Boost Your Libido course. I’m truly humbled, and I pray that it helps you!
And then last night I posted this on Facebook after some negative feedback I got about the #1 post of the week (how to make sex feel great for your husband):
Am getting some complaints that I talk about sex too much on a public forum, and teenagers may see. Here’s the thing: If we DON’T talk about this, we leave a vacuum, and the world fills it. Nothing that I say on my blog is erotic or ungodly. It’s all about healthy sex in marriage. And I guarantee you that the vast majority of 12 or 13 year olds already know far beyond anything I say on the blog, because our culture has it hanging out everywhere. I firmly believe that we need MORE Christian voices here, not fewer. And I try to be as tasteful as possible. I don’t deliberately advertise to teens, and my analytics show that there are actually very, very few teens on my blog. Over 80% are married women from 20-60 (and the rest are mostly married men). So I think we need to stop with the “but teens may see it!” Yes, they may. But what I say is healthy, and it isn’t that graphic. I would prefer they didn’t, but if we try to create a system where teens can NEVER see anything, then neither can the people who really need the information. And then they will Google it instead. And then just imagine what will come up. That is why I am here. I hope you all understand!
That post has gone viral. So many encouraging comments. I’m going to save the post so that next time I’m discouraged I can just read it.
So I just wanted to say–you guys have no idea how much you encourage me. Thank you. And I hope that I can help you, too!
Have a great weekend–and do let me know your thoughts for future courses!