Sometimes it’s better to spend the money and not be frugal.
I totally believe in being responsible financially. I’m a complete Dave Ramsey fanatic, and I love encouraging people to get out of debt and start building wealth–so that we have more resources that we can then bless others with (because that’s what it’s all about).
But at the same time, there are some things that aren’t worth scrimping on, for one of two reasons:
- Either because scrimping now means you’ll pay more later;
- Or because spending a little extra will make such a tremendous difference in your life.
Now I also believe that some things are just never worth the money. Buying beverages, for instance, is always a waste, and it’s so much better to invest in high quality hot and cold beverage containers and take your own along, or just order water at restaurants. In fact, buying beverages in the grocery store isn’t really worth it, either. Juice has too much sugar in it, and pop is bad for you. Drink water or milk or make your own iced teas.
Restaurants aren’t worth it, either. They tend to be super expensive, the food isn’t healthy, and it’s cheaper to buy a ready-made meal at a grocery store if you need to and then enjoy eating in.
Vacations are also overrated. My kids had just as much fun with a week at a Christian Family Camp as they did getting on a plane and going somewhere interesting and staying in expensive hotels.
And we have never in our lives bought a new car. We always buy used and let someone else pay for the depreciation!
So I completely agree that we certainly need to watch what we spend!
But over the years, I’ve come to the conclusion that certain things aren’t worth scrimping on, and are worth the money. See if you’re with me!
3 Areas Where Quality Matters–and Frugality Can Cost You in the Long Run:
1. High Quality Kids’ Beds & Bedding
We bought our kids way too many beds–a total of seven between the two of them. We had toddler beds and then we had bunk beds and then we bought the single beds with those drawers underneath. I think they’re made of particle board–is that the right term?
Anyway, the toddler beds were a waste of money. We could have moved them directly into single beds and saved that expense. But the particle board beds were just really poor quality. We thought we were getting something that was made well, but every single one of them broke after a few years. And we have girls! I can’t imagine what would happen to beds if we had had boys!
(Although, to be fair, the girls did have a lot of hugging contests on the bed like this one):
Once Rebecca was about 15 and her second particle bed broke, we decided that we would just buy a decent bed. So we found an extremely simple bed that was real wood, with thick slats. Pretty much indestructible. Once Katie’s bed broke a year or two later we bought her a wooden one, too.
It went with Katie to school.
It will stand the test of time. And I firmly believe that if we had just bought those wooden beds when the girls were toddlers, they would still be here, indestructible. No more particle board beds! The wooden ones weren’t even that much more expensive–maybe $120 more than the particle board beds. We would have made that back many times over.
Speaking of beds, about six years ago we splurged and bought high quality duvets and pillows. I cannot believe how much better I sleep! And again, they’ve outlasted all the comforters that we ever bought by far. Instead of constantly replacing comforters, we simply have good duvets that last. I think that’s worth it.
2. Good Shoes
I’m not one of those people who has 40 pairs of shoes. I’d actually rather have 10 that fit well and that are really high quality.
When the girls were 13 I started them on a clothing allowance. They got a certain amount of money every year, and they had to pay for their clothes out of that money. I still remember one shopping trip with Katie when she was 14. There were these gorgeous, really well-made Italian sandals for $110. Katie wanted them, but $110 was a lot of money. I convinced her to buy them because they were such a good investment.
Here she is wearing them on her 18th birthday trip:
The insoles wore out this year on her nineteenth birthday, after wearing them everyday every summer for five years, but you can get the insoles replaced at a shoe repair place for about $20. So she’s going to pay for that. These are awesome shoes.
I have a pair of leather ankle boots that I love. They’re my go-to boots for spring and fall. I even wear them when I speak!
I bought them two years ago, and they’ve held up so well. But last spring the heels wore out. So I spent $20 to get the heels replaced, and voila–brand new boots!
I’d rather spend $120 on a pair of good shoes that lasts years then $30 on a bunch of shoes that don’t last and aren’t as comfortable.
3. Five Good Looking Outfits
It is less expensive to buy fewer outfits that you will actually wear and that you feel great in than to buy dozens of items from discount racks that you end up hating and that make you feel frumpy.
I cannot stress this enough.
When women feel pretty, we’re more confident in the rest of our lives. We’re more confident sexually, we’re more confident with our husbands, we’re even better able to meet our goals.
But many of us feel guilty spending any money on ourselves, so we buy cheap clothes that don’t fit well and we end up feeling ugly. Go through my series on fighting the frump from a few years back and see why good quality clothes are worth it! Don’t go overboard, but buy a few outfits that will get you through the week. And then mix & match and feel great, instead of living in clothes that make you feel ugly.
3 Areas Where Time is of the Essence–and Sometimes It’s Worth Paying Extra to Get More Time
4. Food In a Pinch
How many times do you order pizza because you have no time to cook and you don’t know what to make anyway? Or maybe you get takeout on the way home (or even head to a restaurant with your family) because you didn’t have time to grocery shop?
I could tell you to make better meal plans and I could tell you to get more organized, but let’s face it: sometimes life just happens. And I think it’s important to have contingency plans, knowing that life can never be perfect.
Instead of ordering pizza, for instance, could you buy some healthy ready-made dinners and put them in the freezer, to use only in the case of emergency? I did this when the kids were little, and it saved me many nights!
5. Food Delivery
This one’s not for everybody, but it’s a GREAT idea for some people. Let me tell you about Chef’s Plate, a Canadian company that will send you all the ingredients you need to make a fresh, healthy home-cooked meal, with the recipe and all the instructions. It’s actually really cool! They contacted me to ask if I’d be interested, but since I’m on the road on a speaking tour, I asked them to send two sample meals to my daughter Rebecca and her husband Connor.
Every week you can choose from 7 recipes (for the 2-person plan) or 4 recipes (for the family plan). The meals run about $10.95 per person, which is cheaper than a restaurant. It arrives at your door in a refrigerated package, and then you just cook it when you want to. All the instructions are there!
The kids ordered grilled dijon chicken and steak fajitas. Rebecca said they tasted amazing! And it was super easy.
Rebecca has a friend who is a busy entrepreneur who has used Chef’s Plate for years. He got tired of eating out at restaurants, and was worried about his health with all the restaurant food, so he went to Chef’s Plate. They do the shopping, the thinking for you, and send you the meals by mail–you just have to cook. But the recipes are always super fast ones!
Again, it’s not for everyone, but I can definitely see the benefits of this if you’re a two-income family and time is your most precious resource. I know when the kids were little we ate out far too many times because I was just too busy to cook. If I had just admitted it to myself and said, “I know we’re going to go to a restaurant once a week anyway” and gotten Chef’s Plate instead, I would have ended up saving us some money and eating better.
Chef’s Plate is available in most regions of Canada, and if you sign up using the code #TOLOVEHONORANDVACUUM, you’ll get 3 plate credits off of your first order (which is awesome!).
Check it out here!
Not in Canada? There are likely similar services near you.
6. House Cleaning Service
My life got so much easier when I finally hired a housekeeper last year and stopped trying to do it all myself! If a housekeeper won’t break the bank, then sometimes it’s worth hiring out those jobs that take a lot of our time, so that we have more time for our families or just to have some down time. The same goes for lawn cutting services, snow shovelling services, or even mending clothes. If you’re chronically busy and chronically exhausted and you do have some extra money, then blessing someone who really needs the income can definitely be worth it.
So there you go–six areas where I definitely would invest extra money, while continuing to be responsible and frugal in other areas of your life. Now I’d love to know–do you agree with me? Or what would you add to the list?
Fun post! As for beds and bedding, my oldest two sons are using the bunk beds that two sets of my brothers used! Yup! These beds have been in use pretty much constantly for probably 20 years! Same comforters, too! Yay for hand me downs (my boys also have all their Sunday dress clothes, including ties and suits).
As for shoes, I just replaced sandals, that I paid $80 bucks, and that I used for 8 plus years ago… But I replaced them with $5 men’s sandals! I’m home and mostly barefoot, so shoes are not a priority right now. I also am very tall and wear a women’s shoe size that most stores don’t carry.
Oh, man, a weird shoe size would be so difficult! I can totally see going with men’s shoes then. 🙂 Out of curiosity, are the bunk beds real wood or metal? We bought particle board–big mistake. I can see metal beds totally lasting, though.
Yes, real wood! 🙂 The older set of brothers used them as bunk beds, but my younger set of brothers used them as separate beds. Now my boys are using them stacked as bunks. My brothers did eventually outgrow them and need extended twins, because they are all super tall, but great investment!
I definitely agree with you about the kids beds. We did get a toddler bed, but it was a hand me down. My brother in law made us a bunk bed set from wood that it super sturdy. We have 4 boys and I have no doubt that it will last through their teenage years with no problems.
I do have about 5 pairs of high quality shoes, and I love them! They are Dansko brand and are the only shoes that don’t hurt my feet. I recently lost a LOT of weight and my shoe size changed so I had to buy new ones, but it wasn’t a question of which ones to get.
I haven’t tried the meal delivery yet, but hope to someday. And one of my dreams is to have someone else clean my house. For now I just have my boys work with me on it. As they get older they are improving. And they don’t just expect me to do it all.
Having your boys clean your house is perfectly SMART! Because then they’ll know how to clean when they move out. Absolutely! And way to go on getting healthier, too! Buying new shoes must be kind of fun. 🙂
If you’re in the US, I get HelloFresh (three meals for two people), and I LOVE it.
I’m with you 100% on beds and bedding. We spend bucks on our mattresses, pillows, and sheets. It makes such a huge difference. We love our bed so much, it’s a little ridiculous. And because we love our bed, we spend more time in it. If ya know what I mean. 😉
I do know what you mean. 🙂
This makes me smile because it reminds me of something I read once.
“Never try to save money on the three things that you use between yourself and the earth – Tires, Sheets, and Shoes.”
It’s always made me think – I know there are exceptions to every rule, depending on your circumstances and etc, but you are definitely right – there are some things not worth saving on!
I love that! And I agree about tires, too. But my husband always buys those so I really don’t know much about it. 🙂
I have to disagree with vacations. Totally worth the expense to see new places, do things you normally can’t do, and spend QUALITY TIME with your spouse or family. I look forward to getting away with my husband one day for a 5 to 7 day vacation. It’ll take 2 days to decompress from having a toddler under me 24 hours a day!
Yeah, maybe I’m not sure about that point, either. We have had some AWESOME vacations! I guess I just mean that you can have fun close to home, too, and we shouldn’t ignore vacations if we don’t have the money to get on a plane. But the Grand Canyon was amazing! Major memories.
Yup. And I’m totally looking forward to seeing Scotland. And Italy? Paris? Spain? Cultural experiences are soooo worth getting out of redneck America, lol.
There are rednecks (or cultural equivalents) everywhere. 😉
My husband and I went to Greece last year after my miscarriage and spent the money we would have spent on a baby for it. I don’t want to say “worth it,” because that sounds wrong, but it was fantastic for us to get away and do something amazing. I had a third visit with a fertility doctor today and we’re hoping to take my stepson to Ireland in the spring to do something either pre-baby (if I’m optimistic) or at least to build family memories with the three of us.
Of course, Logan has just as much fun at the Tulsa Zoo when we visit my family or (his favorite) just watching a million hours of Netflix on Saturday. Kids are pretty easy going. I think it’s really nice to have a mix of exciting / exotic adventures and staycations. So you can enjoy wherever you are.
I was blessed in that my son’s crib converted into a toddler bed using the same mattress from his crib. Which was purchased for me by my Mom before he was born. We have since bought him a nice Cherry bed set with a decent mattress at a local furniture store that was his big Christmas present one year. He has an Ohio State comforter to go with it. We now have a King Sized bed that is a little over a year old. I am going to get a better comforter set for it and a new pair of sheets.
I buy nice shoes. In the summer, I’m in flip-flops and I’ve had the pair I’m currently wearing for 2 years. Reef brand, purchased at Dicks Sporting Goods for $27. At work, I invest in good quality sneakers because I’m on my feet a LOT! Just got a new pair of New Balance sneakers. That are all leather. I have a pair of Danskos as well. but they aren’t comfortable enough for me to wear them to work. I wear them with my jeans. The pair of shoes I had on when we met for froyo? Those were hand-me-downs from a family friend and practically brand new. Most of my cheaper casual shoes were purchased for me by my Mom at Walmart for like $1 each when they’re on clearance at the end of the seasons…lol.
I would rather clean my own house. It’s hard to trust someone to come in and clean for you. Sorry but people steal. There’s been a few cases on the news where a cleaning lady cased out a home and then her boyfriend went back in when the cleaning lady found out they weren’t gonna be home and took jewelry, guns, electronics. My area has a HUGE Crystal Meth problem and addicts steal from others to support their habit. Yep, house is locked tight but if criminals wanted to enter, they could.
I used to buy used cars until I bought one with the money I received at high school graduation. That car lasted me less than 4 months before the engine blew. So I was ought $800 and had no transportation to get back and forth to Nursing School. I DO keep my cars for a very long time. In the state where I live, we don’t have to get our cars inspected and I also live in a county where emissions testing is also not required. I had my last vehicle for 11+ years, it had over 150K miles on it. I live in a snowbelt and drive a distance to work. Used to be 30 miles one way, I’ve since cut my commute in half.
I don’t think I’d pay for a food delivery service either. My husband is an excellent cook, especially with our Power Pressure Cooker XL. Many yummy meals have been made with that. Also the crock pot is a huge timesaver. We do go out to eat about twice a month or so. Last Friday we went to a restaurant called Melt. It’s a chain of stores based in NE Ohio and they serve Grilled Cheese sandwiches with all kinds of crazy combos. They’ve been on Diners Drive ins and Dives. SO good. We try to stick to local restaurants to support the economy and use ones that we feel are a good value.
While we don’t take elaborate vacations, or any really,, I do think that getting away from life for awhile isn’t necessarily a bad thing. I’d love to go to Disneyland in Orlando someday. Or Universal Studios to see Harry Potter World. lol
We’re bad in our house about drinking pop. Diet Soda addicts here.
I just put a bunch of clothes in a bag to give to Goodwill. I HATE clothes shopping. Being plus-sized AND having larger than normal breasts, makes blouse shopping difficult. I don’t like things too low cut because I don’t wish to draw attention to myself. My next purchase will be a few new pairs of jeans.
I solve the low cut blouse or dress problem with an oversized bralette over my bra. Its like having a camisol to solve the problem without the extra fabric (or heat!).
+1!
Also, I am thinking of hitting Victoria’s Secret and getting those lacy bras that are almost like a sports bra to wear under dresses with weird-cut armholes or necklines, so it doesn’t look like I’m flashing bra. Thank God for lacy, quasi-shirt undergarments.
While those are good suggestions. I’m a 40DDDD. Those bralette things do not work for someone like myself. and even the biggest bralette I’ve seen are just not made in my size. :/
Yeah, that’s a problem. Not one I’ve ever hard, though. All padding, baby. 🙂
So true about beds and bedding!
We have a metal bed frame that is unbreakable… We also got quality bedding a few years ago and next on the list are mattresses for me and hubby (he is a side sleeper and likes soft bed and I am a tummy sleeper and love hard mattresses – so we’ll go for two singles instead of one big)
Shoes, I get why to buy quality and I used to have real leather ballerinas for seven years, and quality winter boots for even longer now that I live where no real winter happens… But for the last 4 years I just wore golden flip flops (usually one pair a year) that are super cheap and go with everything. I do own other quality shoes with function like hiking sandals and sneakers but my day to day for 10+ months of the year are 10$ flip flops. can’t beat that!
And a big yes for paying for services to save you time and headache! I am doing online grocery shopping for years now and it is so worth it. The prices of the groceries are on the cheaper level (not high like neighborhood super market but not always the best deal) and the fee for the service is so worth it. I can flip through my saved shopping list in 20 minutes, order, specify a day and time for delivery, get it all carried into my kitchen! It saves us time, gas money, headache, stress (3 children in the super market…), forces me to plan at least some so overall we save by eating out less…
I really like emeals.com. Each week they send you a menu containing seven dinners, including the recipes and a shopping list. I just print it out and leave it in the kitchen. It makes it easy for anyone in the family (we have older kids) to make dinner. The meals are generally quite good and simple.
Although it could go in clothes, def a good quality, well fitting bra. No matter how cute the outfit if the bra is wrong it doesn’t work:)
Totally agree with $ on beds and bedding, we skipped toddler beds and went right to good quality full mattresses for our girls. They can keep the same one until they move out and take it with them:)
Oh, totally agree about bras! I wrote a post on fitting bras, too. SO important.
Do you have any recommendations for duvet/bedding? I have been looking for months for a quality comforter to replace ours (which became lumpy and worn within 6 months of marriage!) and have had a terrible time picking one that I think will work well!
We bought ours at a particular bedroom store in our home town that had high end stuff–but I’ve seen nice stuff even at Bed, Bath & Beyond. The key is the weight. Our comforter is really quite warm because Keith likes to save money on heat by turning it way down in the winter, so it’s actually too heavy to be used in the spring/summer. Then we just use blankets.
One thing my kids did was to buy two separate duvets, because Rebecca totally steals the covers! They have the same sheets, but they each get their own single duvet so that Connor doesn’t freeze!
Totally agree about the shoes. My feet are oddly wide and prone to blisters, so really, the only way I can usually find anything that fits at all is to spend at least $80 a pop at online stores that actually carry the extra wide shoes. Or buy men’s shoes, sadly. But I have had boots last up to a decade, by making sure they were quality enough. The less I have to put myself through trying to find stylish shoes in my size, the better!
I can’t do that minimal wardrobe thing. I’ve tried. Drive me crazy. But I make a lot of my clothes, so that usually helps with the fit and my tendency to be bored by the predominantly neutral colors that most quality ready to wear tends to be. I am trying to force myself to splurge on better quality fabric, though!
And I do disagree on vacations. We did do staycation this year since 1 year olds and hotels aren’t the best combo, but some of my best memories are travel, and I’m looking forward to exploring with my husband and however many kids we end up with!
Good article but I still like our occasional trips to a restaurant. I think it is possible to order halfway healthy meals and for me it’s a break! Not only do I not have to cook but no messy kitchen. For us pizza delivery isn’t an option though.
I agree with your post but I also prioritize spending money for good hair care, whether a cut, cut and colour, or whatever.
THAT’S the one I forgot! I actually had a picture ready for it and everything. I was writing this thing and thinking, “I’m forgetting something.” Yep. Haircut. Worth it.
I enjoyed this post. I agree about buying quality shoes, clothing and bras. I started wearing Clark’s shoes several years ago and they really are so comfortable and worth the extra expense. I also just cleaned out my closet of all my pre-pregnancy clothing that doesn’t fit, and now that I have very little clothing I’m working on building a small “capsule wardrobe”. I was just getting cheap clothing from the dollar store, but quality fabrics and cuts have made me feel much better about my post pregnancy body and they last so much longer. (Thanks to my husband that told me I needed some good clothing). Also, a poor fitting bra can really make life miserable.
The quality bed is an good idea too. Most of our furniture is solid furniture that has been passed down in our family. It does hold up to wear and tear much better. For our boys, we bought cribs that convert into toddler and twin beds, so hopefully they are up to the challenge of rambunctious boys. 😀
I’m not sure that I agree with the restaurants though. We don’t eat out a lot, but when we do part of the benefit to it is the “getting out and away” aspect of it. It’s something fun and different. I feel the same way about vacations too. I also think it’s worth the money to stay in a hotel and not have to bunk on a family member’s couch too!
Oh, I have a pair of Clark’s black heels that are my go-to shoes for speaking in the wintertime! I love them.
I’d add a babysitter along with a house cleaner!
Yep.
I used to agree with you in thinking that vacations were a waste of money – until I had a conversation with another mom and she was talking about how important vacations are for bonding with your family. The light bulb went on then and I’ve been more free with what we spend on vacations since. Now, of course, you don’t have to spend big money on a vacation to get the bonding benefits. We’ve spent time camping (cheap) and in the Caribbean (not so cheap) and both have been great for family togetherness.
I also disagree (somewhat) with the housekeeper issue. When kids are really young, I think it’s a great sanity-saving thing that should be carved into the budget when at all possible. However, when they get older, kids should be shouldering some of the load. If we had a housekeeper, I would be depriving them of the skills and character building that come with cleaning the house. My kids are 9 and 11 now and they (and I) each do a bathroom, part of the vacuuming, dusting, etc.
Okay, I think I’m going to write a Mea Culpa on Monday about vacations! I actually do agree with you. We’ve had some amazing vacations as a family. I guess I’m just thinking of some personal friends I know who are taking vacations who can’t afford them, and I’m getting worried about all the money they’re spending. So that was just on my mind when I wrote it. I think vacations are great IF you save up the money beforehand. But the problem is that so many people just put it on their credit card!
We deliberately have one of those travel credit cards where we earn points for airfare, and we used it to fly the whole family to Copenhagen this summer before our cruise. That’s one way to make vacations cheaper! But I still don’t think we should go into debt for them. 🙂
Totally agree about footwear.
I used to buy cheap shoes – and noticed 2 things: my feet would hurt, and I’d soon be buying another pair.
Now, I only own a few pair – mostly black, with a neutral silvery pair of sandals for summer. I’ve spent up to $200 for a good pair of boots. Expensive, yes, but I wear them every day for about 6 months a year, and I’ve had them a few years. For summer, I had one dressy and one casual pair of Naot sandals. I look for sales, but the quality is good enough to last several years, and it feels like I’m walking on pillows.
When I wear uncomfortable shoes, I don’t feel like walking. I can’t wait to get home and kick off my shoes, I’m more tempted to take a taxi instead of walking, and I’m not really enjoying myself if I wear stiletto heals to a wedding or event. Being mobile saves money.
I would add that it’s worthwhile to spend money of a good cell phone case (I like Otter). I’m a klutz. I need something that lets me drop my phone and have no worries about it continuing to work.
It’s worthwhile to spend just a few more dollars on a few decent pots and a slow cooker and rice cooker. I like the Starfrit deep covered non-stick pans like this: http://www.walmart.ca/en/ip/starfrit-the-rock-41-quart11-inch-deep-fry-pan-with-lid/6000109757312 Not hugely expensive, but for just a few dollars more than the really cheap non-stick stuff, they last well, and they can be used to cook a lot of different things really well. Conventional cookware sets often include pieces that I just don’t use very often. The slow cooker and rice cooker make it fast and easy to cook at home when we are busy.
A decent hair brush: I got one that looked like this about 20 years ago: http://www.houseofbeautyworld.com/besema35.html?cmp=googleproducts&kw=besema35&country=CAD&usd=1.41&price=16.85&gclid=CJGQ2ryfnM8CFYI0aQod7IQOUw#scProductReviews With the brush and a decent hair dryer, my hair looks straight and full and shiny.
I disagree about vacations. We look for deals, and we usually stay at vacation rentals instead of hotels, but I consider it an investment in our family and mental health. My husband is also a doctor, and he works in our community. Even on a day off, people will call him at home, or knock on our door, or come up to him at the mall, and he’s too nice to say no. He needs to physically get out of town in order to truly relax. When we go away as a couple, it’s amazing for our marriage. When we go away with the kids, it’s a great way to really bond as a family, spend time doing things together and make memories. [Plus, 2 times we went away after I had a miscarriage to deal with the grief and depression, and I have kids who were born 9 months after each trip. Just saying.]
Great comment, and very helpful! Thank you! (And I had a mea culpa about family vacations this weekend. I’ve got a post on that coming out tomorrow! 🙂 ).
Great thoughts about pots, too. We invested in some good cast iron ones and I’m so glad we did!
I am with you on the clothes. I have been considering literally creating 5 go to everyday outfits. I feel like it would save money and time. I know I already have outfits that are picked out and fit great. Way less time in the closet trying to decide what I want to put together to wear.
I went to a capsule wardrobe in the spring and it’s been a lifesaver when I’ve had to pack!
I spend $99 a year to order groceries online and have the store shop for me. Best money I spend all year. I don’t impulse shop in the store, it saves me time, and my sanity. Plus I’m forced to really meal plan and not just for dinner. My husband did the math after 6 months and said we spend about $25 less a week.
That’s awesome! So it’s $99 for the yearly membership? And then they deliver? That’s totally worth it!
In the US we have a meal service similar to your Chef’s Plate called Blue Apron. I’ve heard really good reviews from it and am considering trying at least a trial. Starting out as a newlywed I have no idea where to even start with meals and welcome the ideas! Plus I got a coupon at my bridal shower so there’s that 😉
I have to mention hair i will pay 2 times a year for a good haircut and color …my husband cant do it for me …….
Everything else we do ourselfs