What are some creative ways to tell your husband, “I’m in the mood tonight!”?

I asked on my Facebook Page recently for people’s ideas, and so many replied with some great ones (and some funny ones!)

So today, for Top 10 Tuesday, I thought I’d share 10 fun ways to say, “let’s get it on!”

But first, why do you need a signal for sex?

Quite frankly, sometimes initiating sex, especially for guys, gets intimidating. What if you’re too tired? What if you’re just not in the mood? No guy wants to feel rejected!

So they stop initiating, we feel rejected, and everything comes to a standstill, even if that’s not what we wanted. That’s how people fall into a sexual rut! But if you have a way to say, “you’re going to get lucky tonight if you want!”, then he’s far more likely to try to sweep you off your feet, too.

(Note: if you’re married to a guy who never initiates sex, or who never wants sex, click on those links for posts that may help.)

So send these signals for sex. It’s a way to keep flirting in your marriage. In fact, if you know that you’re likely to make love tonight, and he doesn’t need a signal for sex to get started–send him one anyway! It keeps your relationship exciting, and it shows him that you’re passionate about it too. If you’re just simply a willing participant, rather than someone who from time to time gets the ball rolling, then it’s not as obvious that you actually desire him.

So let’s get creative–and flirty!

Here goes:

Sexy Marriage: Top 10 Ways to Signal for Sex, to let your husband know, 'you're going to get lucky!'

10 Signals For Sex to Have Some Fun Tonight!

1. Put a candle on the bedside table and light it when you’re “in the mood”!

One Facebook commenter said:

We used to have a candle that was battery powered. It glowed with different colors. We ran the battery down… 🙂

2. Change something on the bed to signal, “I want YOU on MY SIDE tonight!”

One commenter said:

We have a throw pillow that I made. One side just matches our bedroom, the other side has a heart on it. The point was that whoever was interesting would flip the pillow to the heart side… Leave it to my husband to let me know every night should be a “heart” night!

3. Wear something that sends a message.

Try a certain piece of jewelry (like a necklace or bracelet he gave you) that you wear when “tonight’s the night”. No one would question why you’re wearing earrings or a necklace, but your husband gets the message!

Or place a nightie in the bathroom in the morning so you can be thinking about sex all day (after all, we women sometimes need some time to prepare for sex–and this is a great way!), and HE gets the message: “this is what I’m coming home to tonight!”

4. Or be SUPER SPICY–and wear something to signal “not just tonight, but RIGHT NOW!”

Try a skirt with no underwear. Let him know that whenever you have that certain skirt on, there’s nothing underneath. And he’s free to explore, or even hike it up and throw you right over the dresser if he wants!

It’s a super fun way to have more quickies. And remember what I’ve written before about the menstrual cycle and libido: after ovulation, often a woman’s libido drops during the latter half the month. It’s harder for her to get in the mood, and it’s often harder to reach orgasm. She’s also a little more moody! This is a great time to take advantage of quickies. It helps her feel super powerful to see how much her husband wants her, it adds some fun and some spice, but it puts no pressure on her to get aroused.

Just have some lubricant handy if needed.

5. Get into bed naked.

It’s hard to mistake that message! Then you can either act all shy or all coy–“why, whatever are you doing?”–or you can climb on top and get right to it!

Sexy Marriage Tips: 10 ways to signal to your husband, "let's get it on!"

Or here’s another idea: watching Netflix tonight? Come downstairs in a robe–and nothing else. As the movie unfolds, open up the robe.

Quite frankly, sometimes initiating sex, especially for guys, gets intimidating. What if you’re too tired? What if you’re just not in the mood? No guy wants to feel rejected!

6. Have a code word that tells him, “I’m interested!”

Several Facebook commenters mentioned this one, and the codewords are all hilarious. “Wanna play touch football?” Or how about “I’ve got a craving for some pumpkin soup?”

One woman uses “jungle”, because Tarzan and Jane were married for life. She says, “I have a friend who says, “Sex is like Christmas; why would you say no?” She thinks her friend’s word should be Santa!

Another woman has a more serious signal: “We say it is a “Blue diamond night” since he needs to know in advance to take a blue diamond pill after going through prostate cancer.” Proof that you can still keep love alive, even with lots of roadblocks!

And if you have a husband with a lower libido, and you’ve talked about making more of an effort to increase the frequency of sex, this is also a great way to do it. Signal earlier in the day so that he has time to get himself ready, too.

7. Try a Sex-Only Perfume

Choose a scent to wear ONLY for this purpose! In fact, you can actually train yourself and your husband to get aroused just by the scent. Here’s how:

One night, when you know things are going to go well, spray the new perfume on when things are getting hot and heavy. Do this a few more times when you know that you’re making some great sexual memories. Now when you smell the scent, it will take you back to those memories.

Or spray it right on one area of your neck (or somewhere else, like your cleavage), and right when your husband reaches climax, lean that part of you in so that he gets a great whiff. Now when he smells that–his body will react. It’s another great way to feel powerful!

Here’s another way to use perfume: spray some on a special spot–and ask him to find where you sprayed it. Or use two different scents, and ask him to find them both.

8. Text Him Something Sexy

Even if you’re in the same room–and even if the kids are in the room!

9. Flash Him

Getting up from the couch to go get a cup of tea? Bend over him on the way up. Heading upstairs? Pull up your shirt for a second! Let him know, “This is what you can get tonight if you try!”

10. Finally, Want to Signal Sex? Just Say It!

Sometimes guys appreciate the direct route! “How about dessert after dinner?” Or even, “I hope you’re ready because I have plans for tonight!”

Then take him by the hand–or something else–and lead him upstairs.

That’s how to signal you want sex! What about actually starting to initiate sex? I’ve got some pointers on how to initiate sex right here!

So there you go–10 signals for “I want you tonight!” Now, you know our Top 10 Tuesday policy: pick ONE and do it! And have fun!

Do you find it hard to talk about SEX?

Want to try new things--but don't know how to start?

No more wondering how to talk about what feels good or what you'd like to try. This fun challenge will get you talking and trying new things without the awkward.

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