How to Break Out of a Marriage Rut
Sometimes we get in ruts in marriage.
We’re misunderstanding each other. We say one thing without meaning anything bad by it, but our spouse gets defensive. We’re so sure the other person is angry at us that almost every interaction has tension.
All marriages go through it from time to time. And one thing that I have found helps to change my own attitude, and to change the dynamic, is to ask these two questions every morning:
1. What can I do for you today?
2. How can I pray for you?
You don’t need to elaborate, or say anything more. But then whatever your spouse says, follow through with it.
I got that tip from my blogging friend Joanne Kraft, who graciously took me and my husband out on the town when we were down in Nashville recently. She said, “marriage is just the little things, everyday.” And she started this a while ago. Now she finds quite often her husband doesn’t even have anything he needs her to do. But just knowing that she WANTS to help him goes a long way.
So try it!
Need more help in changing the dynamic in your marriage? Here are a few older posts:
Announcing Winners of our Giveaway!
Last week I posted our April giveaway–and so many of you entered! Thank you so much.
Our winners have now been chosen and notified, but I wanted to remind you of some of the great products, and ask you to support our sponsors.
First, there was Scarf Appeal, a business operated by two SAHMs who make incredible necklace and earrings sets, as well as homemade knitted scarves. Their jewelry sets come out to about $20 with shipping, so they’re so affordable. Browse their currently available products here, and like their Facebook Page so you can see when new products get added.
Then we had ThirtyOne, a business that makes lovely tote bags–and lots of other fun accessories. We gave away a thermal tote, but they also have lots of organizing totes with pockets galore. Sales representative Andea would love to help you find one that works for you!
Finally, we had Scentsy, which makes luscious products for the home, including plugins to enhance the scent of your home, candles, and more. If you want to make your house a home, Scentsy wants to help! Browse their catalog here. Amy Johnson would love to help you!
I’m excited about the giveaways we’ve got planned in May for Mother’s Day, so come on back next month. And remember, if you have a small business and you’d like to be involved in the giveaways, you can learn more information here.
A Few Thoughts on Pain
This has been a rough week in my own church family. Two men have gone to be with the Lord under quite different circumstances, though both were tragic. One died while still in his late fifties, surrounded by those who loved him. The other died alone, after losing his battle with depression. There is so much pain right now, and my heart goes out to both families.
The latter man had struggled with inner darkness for years, which had already torn his family apart. His teenage kids are quite close to my teenage kids, and we knew the situation well. His funeral was packed, and there was not a dry eye in the house. And as I looked around at all those people who really did care, and who had tried to reach out, it made me so sad. Did we not do enough? Maybe not. But I know many who tried, and tried, and tried. I guess what I’m saying is that sometimes, when we feel in the middle of darkness, we also feel alone. And yet, in many cases, that is a lie. You do not have to carry things alone. There are people willing–eager–to help you. I know in the middle of the blackness that’s hard to believe, but it is true. No matter how bad things are, people really do want to reach out. They just don’t always know how.
So many people at that funeral, and yet he felt alone.
If you feel alone, please take the initiative to reach out. I’m sure that you will find at least one hand that will reach back.