It’s Wednesday, the day when we talk marriage! I introduce a topic, and then you all can comment, or put the URL to your own marriage post into the linky below. Today I want to talk about romantic bedrooms.
I know several hundred of my readers are currently working through The 31 Days to Great Sex, my new ebook looking at how we can build a fun, intimate marriage. And one of the things you’ll find when you get to the end of the month is a series of challenges on how to set up your life so that intimacy becomes easier and more natural, with fewer roadblocks.
And one of those roadblocks may very well be our bedroom.
When my two daughters were babies our family was living in a tiny two-bedroom apartment. Our computer was in our bedroom. Our duvet was old and rather ugly. In fact, everything in that room was old and rather ugly.
One winter, after a particularly grueling year during which we were grieving the loss of our little boy, we decided to head south for a vacation and recoup. When we came home, my mother and a friend had redone our bedroom, with new bedding, plump new pillows, and a new lamp.
Unfortunately, they couldn’t move the computer and all the excess stuff out of our room, but even the small effort they made created such a transformation. When I walked into our bedroom I wasn’t depressed anymore. I was happy!
When you walk into your bedroom, do you feel like it’s a haven, or do you feel like it’s a dive?
If your dresser is covered with old VISA receipts, if craft boxes are stacked up in a corner, if your bedding is threadbare and ugly and your pillows are lumpy, then climbing into bed isn’t fun. And if you figure your bed is the best place to fold laundry—it’s so big, and just the right height!—but then that laundry never gets put away, and every night you sweep it onto the floor again, then jumping into bed isn’t going to seem stress free.
We tend to make it a priority to keep the kitchen and living room clean, because that’s what other people see when they come into our homes (though, if we’re honest, many of us rarely have company). But the bedroom is just for us, so if it’s a mess, no one ever sees it.
And so the bedroom is often last on our list.
I think our priorities are wrong.
I think the bedroom should be one of the first places we decorate
–before the baby’s room, before the kitchen, before the living room. A baby doesn’t know the difference if the room is filled with boxes or if it’s straight out of Homes & Gardens. You, on the other hand, do. And if you’re going to nurture your marriage, you need to have a room that you feel is a haven.
Don’t put a TV in there so you’re mindlessly watching CSI instead of talking at night. Don’t bring work there. And don’t bring all your excess boxes in there (unless you honestly can’t help it, like we couldn’t in our tiny apartment).
Christmas is almost upon us, and can I make a suggestion? Why not get together with your husband and plan to buy something for the bedroom this year that will make your bedroom inviting. Maybe it’s a luxurious duvet, or some new bedding. Maybe it’s some luscious pillows. Maybe it’s an awesome tempurpedic mattress. Something that screams “luxury” and romance to you. And if you don’t have the money yet, that’s okay. Just set up a savings jar where you put change in and spare dollar bills. Set up a Pinterest board of bedrooms that say “haven” to you. And nurture your marriage!
It’s easy to forget about ourselves at Christmas and focus mostly on the kids. But children will forget what they got for Christmas when they were 8, or 9, or 11. They will never forget the love that you and your husband shared. What kids need, more than anything else, is to feel as if you and your husband are rock solid. It’s okay to invest in your marriage!
Now, what do you have for us today? Leave a link to the URL of your marriage post in the linky below!
This post is a sponsored post. The links are sponsored–the thoughts are 100% my own. I take sponsored posts to help offset the cost of this blog (which is getting very expensive to run!). But I only accept posts that I are in line with what I was already planning on writing.