Last week was complaint free week at this blog! If you didn’t join in, you can start again! Just go to this first post, and follow the posts for the week. It really will make a difference in your life!

I’d love it if people could share what they experienced when they tried to stop complaining and show gratitude instead.

I think the big thing I noticed is that it’s hard to identify complaining. I know that I can be negative, but it’s easy to couch that negativity in other terms. Oh, I’m just offering constructive criticism. Or I’m just sharing something I’m struggling with with a friend of mine. Or I’m just trying to correct my child and point him or her on the right road.

We can justify just about anything.

Now some of those things are perfectly legitimate. It’s good to discipline children. It’s good to share our struggles with one or two close friends. Quite often, though, we do these things when we don’t need to because we want the attention, or we want to be seen as “the good ones” while everyone else is wrong. It’s the motivation that’s the issue.

And what I found last week is that I don’t always have the right motivation in my interactions. Even if I’m trying to stop from complaining, I often substitute other things for it. And what I need to do instead is to “take every thought captive” to God, and really exercise gratitude and grace.

It was a good exercise, and one I’d like to continue. What about you? Have you tried to stop complaining for a week? And what happened? I’d love to know!

Hello ladies! How are you enjoying complaint free week?

At times I have great difficulties. I wake up and I feel very tired, or I am tempted to offer “helpful observations”, which are really just complaints. But I am trying to keep my mood upbeat!

If you remember, we’ve already had two challenges.

1. Find five things that you’re grateful for everyday.

2. Find a way to talk to your husband about your relationship on a regular basis, so that complaints don’t build up.

Today we have a new one! This one has to do with friends.

Do you know when I complain the most?

It’s when I’m talking on the phone with friends. We complain about church, about committees, about people, about children (especially other people’s children). Whatever.

And what’s worse is that I realize that my children can hear.

So today, and for the rest of the week, I want you to watch what you say to your friends.

Now, I’m not saying we shouldn’t talk about real problems or real issues with our friends. I think we all need 1 or 2 safe women that we can talk to about anything, to hold us accountable, pray with us, and encourage us and guide us. That’s essential.

But usually what happens is that we get talking to friends, and it’s fun to complain and find fault in others. It really is. I’m not sure if it’s because it makes us feel superior or what, but it can be fun to talk about all the things that everyone else is doing wrong. And I am most guilty of this when I have a partner in crime.

I think the purpose of complaint free week is not to stop feeling badly about some things in our lives–we will all have difficulties. It’s to get our eyes off of our difficulties and onto God, who has the solutions. If we talk about struggles with the goal to solve them, that’s fine. If we talk about struggles so that we can focus on our problems and focus on criticizing others, that’s not.

So let’s change the nature of our conversations. Today, when you’re talking to your best friend, sister, or just any friend, ask them what is GOOD in their life. If you need to share a problem, share it with the goal of finding a solution, not going over and over someone else’s faults. Tell them what you feel blessed about, and what you are praying for.

In a nutshell,

Complaint Free Challenge Three: Talk about blessings with a friend on the phone today, instead of talking about difficulties!

Go to it, and leave a comment about how it’s going with you this week!