2012 is upon us, and I thought I’d open the year by coming up with a list of the 50 best marriage quotes I could find from 2011 from different marriage blogs. So here they are, organized by topic, though in no particular order. Some are funny; some are profound. Some are convicting; some are simply research statistics. But I find them all interesting, and I hope you will, too! I do not necessarily 100% agree with all of them, but I thought they could stimulate discussion. And maybe you’ll discover some new blogs in the process.
Perspective
1. Love is by definition focused on its object. If I’m thinking about me, I am not focused on loving my man.
Elspeth, Traditional Christianity, The Heart of the Five Love Languages
2. The biggest barrier to a good attitude is self. It can be the self-pleasuring of a mate who spends hours looking at online pornography, the self-focus of being too tired or too body conscious to make love, or the self-preservation instinct of someone who was molested in their childhood years. Yes, this is a wide range of issues, but a healthy sexual relationship must begin with prioritizing relational intimacy above one’s self. Let me be clear: These are not all selfishess, but they are about self. For some, putting the marriage first means a simple attitude adjustment; for others it requires deep self-examination or therapy to heal from a painful history.
Hot, Holy and Humorous, Godly Sex is Complex
3. Too many of us have virtually no respect for what a husband really needs, but we have unlimited respect for our own needs. And we’re not only hurting our husbands–we’re hurting ourselves.
To Love, Honor and Vacuum, Why He Won’t Meet Your Needs
4. Christian women have come to believe on the one hand we’re to always treat others the way we want to be treated, and on the other that doing this for our husbands makes us a doormat.
Elspeth at Traditional Christianity, Why You Should Cater to Your Husband
5. We fight because of our desires, specifically unfulfilled desires. Sound familiar?
One Flesh Marriage, Sex: The Art of Asking for More
6. It’s one of those cases where you may win the battle but lose the war. In marriage, it’s either win-win or lose-lose. There is no win-lose. If you both don’t win, you both lose.
To Love, Honor and Vacuum, Am I too Hard on Women?
7. Remember – there are no exceptions in the Bible where it says on Birthdays, Mother’s Day and Valentine’s Day we have permission to get selfish and self-centered.
Women Living Well, What a Majority of Men Want for Valentine’s Day
8. We judge ourselves by our intentions. We judge our spouses by their actions. No wonder we think we’re better!
Anne Moodie, To Love, Honor and Vacuum, Live Blogging FamilyLife Canada’s Weekend to Remember Conference
9. Marriage is meant to be more about your surrender than about your satisfaction.
Journey to Surrender, Concluding Thoughts on Sexual Surrender.
10. Nowhere in the Bible does it say that we should wait for someone else to do the right thing before we do the right thing.
To Love, Honor and Vacuum, Am I too Hard on Women?
Sex
11. If the church is really all about good marriages and preventing divorce, it seems to me that we need to get very serious about helping couples with sex.
The Generous Husband, Sex–Important to Husbands and Wives
12. Sex is God’s idea. It is His blessing to husbands and wives. It is His provision for making children, increasing intimacy, and providing pleasure to married couples whom He loves. Take a brief moment today to thank Him for sex.
Hot, Holy and Humorous, Are you Thankful for Sex?
13. Your husband is not an “animal” for wanting to have sex. He is not being unreasonably demanding. And he is not a selfish pig.
Intimacy in Marriage, What Sex-Starved Husbands Tell Me
14. God-honoring sex is not dirty. But it is flirty!
Hot, Holy and Humorous, Talking Flirty vs. Talking Dirty
15. Interestingly, for the couples who used pornography as a tool or enhancement in the relationship, as therapy progresses, one or both of them didn’t really like the effects of it on themselves or the relationship. They were simply appeasing their partner’s desire.
Simple Marriage, Living According to What You Hold Dear
16. Sex will fall by the wayside if you do not intentionally make it a priority.
One Flesh Marriage, Sex is the Glue
17. You don’t need a lot of money to plan an off-the-charts sexual experience with the man you love. You don’t need a 5-star hotel, expensive outfit or $100 bottle of wine. All you need is your heart and a little creativity.
Intimacy in Marriage, The 5 Cheapeast Ways to Turn Your Husband On
18. Sex should be deeply intimate and connecting, and while the physical pleasure is great and important, too much focus on that (for yourself or your bride) means not having the ability to focus on other vital aspects of the sex act. Maybe we would all enjoy sex more, and maybe even have more of it, if we stuck to a narrow menu, with something extra thrown in only very rarely.
Generous Husband, How Much Variety Does it Take?
19. Quantity is a poor substitute for quality. Quantity plays a role, but it is a supporting role, not the leading role.
Intimacy in Marriage, Happy Husbands Come from Wives Who Put Out
20. Researchers found that spouses who reported above-average sexual satisfaction were 10 to 13 times more likely to be “very happy” in their marriage, compared with those who were less satisfied sexually.
Marriage Gems, Want a Happier Marriage? Be Generous
21. Intimacy should not be equated with sex. In fact, chances are, if you aren’t intimate in the other areas of your life your sexual intimacy will be one of the first things to suffer.
Marriage Life, Intimacy is a Marathon not a Sprint
22. So here is the bottom line for Christian leaders: Sexual refusal is a common and growing issue. Ignoring it does not mean it does not exist in your church, and being embarrassed about it does not get you off the hook with God.
Generous Husband, The Sex Sin the Church Ignores
Commitment/Intimacy
23. The myth that women can open up to someone who may not marry, or remain married to them, is hogwash, baloney, hooey, and crap. Women want – no, need – security if they are to relax and to give themselves completely to their marriage partner. How can you feel free in the bedroom to give yourself fully to someone who may or may not be there tomorrow? Wives need to know that their hubbies love ‘em and will love ‘em tomorrow, and the next day, and the next day.
Hot, Holy and Humorous, How Women Feel About Noncomittal Sex
24. When you have children, your marriage is now more important, not less, because other people are counting on you!
To Love, Honor and Vacuum, Avoiding Marriage Ruts
25. Don’t let another day go by where the health of your relationship is sacrificed for a false sense of peace.
The Romantic Vineyard, Water into Wine
26. And in a world of celebrities constantly splitting up, having a good, solid marriage is something that can make others believe that God does make a difference, and that lifetime love is possible.
To Love, Honor and Vacuum, People are Watching Your Marriage
27. The desire for a happy marriage is present, strong and unquenchable. The work it takes to make a happy marriage is what most people standing at the altar do not understand.
Between The Sheets, Surprising Survey Finds Marriage is a Priority Among College Students
Acceptance
28. Give your man a break. Let him be who God designed him to be.
Hot, Holy and Humorous, Prince Ideal vs. Prince Real
29. Even if you are right, and she is wrong (and you are not right as often as you think, trust me on this) does that mean God has appointed you to correct her?
Generous Husband, Being Able to Disagree Agreeably
30. You don’t have to agree with him over everything. Just value him, listen to him and take him into consideration when there are choices to be made. And, please, never disgrace him publicly.
The Generous Wife, Worth and Value
31. How we handle our husband’s shortcomings reveals more about our own character than our husbands.
Women Living Well, How to Deal with Disappointment in Marriage
32. You might think that you have all of the answers and need to protect your husband from making the wrong choice, but nagging, pouting, losing your temper and complaining aren’t going make him a better man.
Time Warp Wife, Trust in the Potter
33. You are not his mother. He had a mother. He wants a wife! Your job is to make him happy, not holy. God does a better job at that.
Lori Alexander, Ashton’s Desire for a Wife
34. As I released my fears and unrealistic expectations, I started to really like and love my man for who he is – as a husband, father and friend. My heart and my marriage began to heal.
Renee Swope, RooMag, Searching for Happily Ever After
35. Your love for each other doesn’t have to be overwhelmed by your differences.
The Simple Mom, Will We Ever See Eye to Eye?
36. God is the ultimate rewarder, and will ensure that you get what you’re due. Trust him to take care of you while attempt to take care of your spouse.
Marriage Works, The Danger of Scratch My Back and I’ll Scratch Yours
37. Because one thing I’ve (finally!) learned is that no matter how I may be feeling at the moment, my husband is never “a problem”! He does not need me to “solve” him. “Math mode” simply does not work for marriage.
One Thing I’ve Learned, Healthy Marriages Major in History (Not Math)!
Marriage Tips
38. Kiss every chance you get.
Intimacy in Marriage, Do You Really Have Plenty of Time to Nurture Your Marriage?
39. What you do EVERY DAY matters more than what you do ONCE IN A WHILE,
Simple Marriage, The Secrets of Marriage
40. Most guys like to look and touch. Don’t be stingy with your body.
Generous Wife, Show Your Skin
41. As husbands, I think one reason we have some trouble with Paul’s command to love our wives “as Christ loved the church,” is that we don’t really fully know how Christ loves the church.
Journey to Surrender, What Kind of Love is This?
42. Hug him like you mean it!
Time Warp Wife, 10 Ways to Love Your Husband
43. Your only expectation of your future husband should be that he walk with Jesus. You want a man who will be a spiritual leader and that you worship Jesus together. If you have that, the chances of having a happy marriage are very high.
Lori Alexander, Your Standard of Beauty
44. You and your spouse are created in the image and likeness of God. Marriage speaks to the world about the Nature of God. Since Satan cannot hurt God, he will hurt you, His image, or your marriage, His reflection. Satan will interfere with your marriage in any way inhumanly possible. If he can’t end the marriage, he will mar it to make it as imperfect a reflection of God as he can entice the two of you to make it.
Garden of Holiness, Why Sex is Complicated
45. Put a couple together doing something for someone else and you’ll see a marriage full of joy that is contagious.
The Romantic Vineyard, So Where’s Your Focus
46. Nothing will undermine your effectiveness as a leader faster than a bad marriage.
Michael Hyatt, How to Become Your Spouse’s Best Friend
47. Having a goal helps us make choices that free us. The goals don’t chain us.
The Simple Mom, Living a Good Story in the Chaos
48. Never think that you are doing your children a favor by prioritizing them over your husband.
To Love, Honor and Vacuum, Your Husband Trumps Your Kids
49. A child-centered marriage is a recipe for disaster. Teach children early that their “happiness” is not Mom or Dad’s reason for living.
Breathing Grace, Everything I Know About Marriage in 200 Words or Less
50. Marriage is hard work and can be a bumpy road at times. But if I hang on tight to the hem of Jesus and the hand of my husband – I’ll have the best ride of my life!
Women Living Well, 14 Things I’ve Learned in 14 Years of Marriage
I hope you’ve enjoyed these! I’ll try to do make it a regular feature. And if you see any awesome quotes about marriages on blogs, send them to me!


















What a fabulous post Sheila!!! Thanks for the shout outs, but more importantly, thank you for being such an advocate for marriage and sexual intimacy!
I feel in very good company to be mentioned with so many other fabulous bloggers!
Julie Sibert recently posted..Is It Reasonable to Say “No” to Oral Sex?
A great list of advice; thank you for compiling this. Also, thanks for including Marriage Gems in #21! Best wishes for 2012!
Lori Lowe
http://www.LoriDLowe.com
What an amazing resource this is. I had a lot to contemplate as I read! Thanks for sticking me on this list. I’ve had a wonderful blogging year, and I so appreciate your friendship and ministry. Keep doing what you do for marriages! God will be doing some terrific stuff in 2012!
J (Hot, Holy & Humorous) recently posted..High Standards, Low Expectations: A Plan for 2012
Thanks for posting these! They are great thought provoking quotes! Love them. Also thanks for introducing me to some new blogs! Happy New Year and keep up the great work! God bless!
Great quotes to start great conversations. I shared it everywhere. I especially appreciate #8, #9, and #23.
Diane Yuhas recently posted..Comment on Bree’s Story: Safety In Numbers by Diane Yuhas
Thank you for the quotes Sheila and for introducing me to some new blogs! Be blessed! Happy New Year!
Thank you so much for spending the time putting this together. I have already gotten some great information for future posts. Also, thank you for including a few of my quotes! Happy New Year!
Lori recently posted..Smile At The Future
You’re so welcome, Lori! Thanks for always being a part of Wifey Wednesday. I tried to mention you in Twitter but couldn’t find you there, so if you are on Twitter, just send me your Twitter Name and I’ll mention you there, too!
I am vishwendra tiwari (Indian), I am not a christian but I want to get married in a christian way so Please can you suggest me how it can be possible? I will thankfull to you for your support.
How much age is require for christian marriage? Is there any boundation that I can not marrie in a christian way?
I am waiting for your reply.
Thanks
Vishwendra Tiwari
Wow! these are great! I’m leading a group (accountability captain) for Ashley Pichea’s #31 Days to Pray for your Spouse – I’d like to quote #31 and then link back to your post here! Would that work for you?
kellidparker@yahoo.com or lmk on the blog anywhere! or @AdventurzNchild on twitter! Thanks!
kelli- AdventurezInChildREaring recently posted..31 Days to Pray – For Your Spouse – Starting the New Year Off Right!
Absolutely! That’s great. Glad you liked it!
What an incredible collection of marriage building and perspective changing quotes. I’m honored to be included and can’t wait to share a link with friends!
Thanks, Renee! Great to have another RooMag contributor here!
This is a great list – a wealth of positive information! Most of this I wish I knew BEFORE I got married; however, I know it’s not too late to apply these principles to my marriage.
Heather recently posted..Handmade Holidays
This is awesome Sheila! I have a few faves, #’s 3, 4, 14!!, 16, 24, 30, 33, 48, 49, & 50. But all of those are great and what can I say but you nailed it! Thanks for sharing this. It brought attention to a few things I need to tend to. Thank You! Highlighting #14…husbands love to be flirted with via their wives!
Sheila,
What a great list and I love the idea. Wow! You’ve started the new year off with some great things to think about. Love it! And thank you for including a couple of our posts in your list. We are honored. We look forward to what God has in store for all of us in the coming year.
Blessings,
Debi
Debi – The Romantic Vineyard recently posted..2011 in Review
Thanks, Sheila for the link love. It means a lot coming from you.
terry@breathinggrace recently posted..Happy New Year
I love this, these are so insightful. I think you are my favorite blog to read.
Sexy Christian Wife recently posted..New Year Goals
What a great list! Honored to be in such company! Thanks.
Scott
Scott recently posted..What Kind of Love Is This?
What great quotes! Looking forward to quoting some of them.
Fawn recently posted..Changing the Conversation
Great quotes. Shared them on FB page and in my Godly Wives On Purpose group. Very thought provoking and inspirational.
April recently posted..Peace, Love and Soul in 2012!
Awesome! I love it when people share.
“Put a couple together doing something for someone else and you’ll see a marriage full of joy that is contagious.” We just recently discovered how true this is. I love it, now, when we volunteer to do things together. I feel more connected and because we are both sharing in the joy of giving, it really does seems to double the reward, as trite as that sounds.
That’s wonderful, Rachel! I find the same thing with my husband.
Sheila,
What an amazing post! I loved reading through all of these. Truly amazing, challenging and humbling! We are so blessed to be doing marriage minisrty with you! God’s plan for marriage is so amazing and the burden on our heart to share is great. Thank you for all that you do and for sharing some of our blog! We appreciate it more then we can express. Blessings to you and your hubby this year! Kate and Brad
i really enjoy the piece it is very insightful as i gained a lot being about to be couple.
Okay, how am I just now finding this post. Best post ever!!
Great post! So sharing … love love love especially since today’s our 24th anniversary!
(now if only he were in the same State LOL)
Great quotes to start great conversations. I shared it everywhere. I especially appreciate quotes 8 and 9
Tulisa recently posted..Melt Your Man’s Heart Review – Can You Really Get Your Ex Back?