'Holding hands at vigil' photo (c) 2009, Keshet: GLBT inclusion in the Jewish Community - license: http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nd/2.0/Waiting until your marriage for sex. That’s a quaint idea, isn’t it? And rather unrealistic, right?

I can understand why people think that. After all, sex is something enjoyable, and we don’t want to get so uptight that we don’t live life to the fullest. And with most couples living together now before marriage, it’s assumed that everyone will have sex.

Even those in the church don’t really wait. In the survey I did for my research for my new book, The Good Girl’s Guide to Great Sex, I found that only 37% of Christian women actually did wait until their wedding night. Most of us are starting marriage with sexual experience. So if that’s true, is it really such a big deal?

Yep. Here’s the thing: of those who did make love to their now husbands before they were married, many expressed amazing regret. But of the virgins, not one said, “I wish I had been more experienced.”

And that makes sense, because sex is so much better when it’s kept between marriage. I know abstinence seems impossible, but it’s not. And when you wait, you open yourself up to the best sex life possible, because those who tend to enjoy sex the most tend to be those who waited for marriage. And there’s reasons for that: you have less sexual baggage; you end up being better friends; you feel closer to God; and you learn to appreciate all aspects of sex, and not just the physical pleasure. I wrote a long article about the benefits of waiting a while back, and it’s been linked to a ton on Pinterest this week, which reminded me about it, and made me think that perhaps I should remind you of it, too.

Sex Before Marriage: Why God wants us to wait until marriage to make love.So please read it, and share it with your friends who aren’t married yet. Waiting until you’re married is a blessing. It sets you up for marriage right. And it is absolutely possible.

I was also reminded of this by this YouTube clip I saw passed around Twitter lately: a young man explains “sex, love, and fairytales”. Again, excellent. Please share it with young people you know!



And the best way to share? Just hit the Facebook buttons or Twitter buttons below, and then tell your friends to read & watch these.

Wait until marriage. It’s such an important issue. And we’ve forgotten that it’s not just possible; it’s actually wonderful and freeing. And in all of February, we’re starting the 29 Days to Great Sex for those of you who are already married! So stay tuned.

Update: You can read the 29 Days to Great Sex here.