When I Have to Say Thank You

Friday Roundup on To Love, Honor and VacuumI am overwhelmed at the support that you all have given me since 9 Thoughts That Can Change Your Marriage was released last week.

I’m thrilled that hundreds of you bought it on the 18th and really boosted my Amazon ranking (thank you!). And most of all I’m thrilled with the emails and reviews I’ve received from those who have read it.

It’s hard when you write a book. You’re so close to it for so long that it becomes almost boring–you wonder if you said anything original at all. So when people post instagram pics with certain sentences underlined–I almost get goosebumps!

And I know that this week was a crazy week, and a hard week for many of you, with the whole Ashley Madison story. For many of you, who have reached out to me, it brought back memories of discovering your husband’s porn use. I’m sorry for your pain. I really am. I hope some of what I wrote this week helped.

But first, here are the biggest posts from this week, in case you missed some:

What’s #1 at To Love, Honor and Vacuum

10 Best Ways to Save MoneyJosh Duggar and Finding Peace#1 New Post on the Blog: On Sexual Double Lives, Josh Duggar, and Finding Peace
#1 on the Blog: Top 10 Ways to Initiate Sex
#1 on Facebook: 10 Ways to Save Money
#1 on Pinterest: Stocking Stuffers for Your Husband (it’s not even Christmas yet and this post is already big! Bookmark it for later)

Thank you to those who bought 9 Thoughts That Can Change Your Marriage

Nine Thoughts That Can Change Your Marriage: Because a Great Relationship Doesnt Happen by AccidentLaunch week is always nerve wracking. Will anyone buy it? Will anyone notice it?

So I just want to say thank you to those of you who did!

I am blown away by all the reviews on Amazon, but I just wanted to post this one. I think I know who may have written it–I think it may be a long time blog reader–but I don’t know, because the woman I’m thinking of is Australian, and I think she would have spelt “favourite” with a “u” (like I do). So maybe I’m wrong. But whoever it is, thank you! (And to all the rest of you who left reviews, I appreciate you so much, too! I know I’m going to get some bad feedback on this one because I do challenge the conventional wisdom, so the more reviews we get early that are positive, the better!)

9Thoughts Reader Review

And, as always, if you haven’t bought it yet–please do! If you like this blog, it encapsulates my whole philosophy in one book. And it’s easy to share a book with others, too–much easier than saying, “go read her whole blog”.

Button Order the Book

(and in answer to the questions about the prizes, prizes 1 and 3-5 have been contacted and awarded, but we never heard back from our email to the person who won me taking them out to dinner. So I’m going to pick another winner today and let them know! Once we have confirmation from all 5 winners I’ll announce them here).

A Word About Anna Duggar

After writing about Josh Duggar and the Ashley Madison scandal, I was seeing so many comments saying, “she should just leave him.” It’s not that I disagree–I honestly don’t know what she should do. But I did post this on Facebook, and it seemed to resonate with many of you, so I thought I’d post it here, too.

I just feel the need to comment one more time on Anna Duggar. So many people are saying, “she should leave the (insert bad word here)”. And I certainly have some sympathy. And so many are saying about Josh: “He only apologized because he got caught; that’s not real repentance.” That may very well be true. But it also may not. I have spoken to so many porn users and those having affairs who were so relieved when it finally came to light because the stress of living a double life was too much. The truth is we don’t know what’s going on in that family; we DO KNOW that unless Josh is completely honest with God, himself, and his family about both the porn use/affairs and the molestation there is no healing and there is no hope for the marriage. And we know that, should Anna choose to leave, she certainly has grounds and God will be with her. But other than that, we don’t know. But I will say this: many people ARE glad to be found out. And for many people on this blog, the discovery, while horrible, was the beginning of healing. If you’re walking in a dark part of your marriage, just remember: sometimes the time that is darkest is actually the beginning of the journey home.

This is the funniest video ever.

And I’m not just saying that because I’m their mother!

Here are my daughters, right after they had their wisdom teeth out. Let’s just say that Rebecca, my super serious, studious daughter, had a little bit of a reaction to that anaesthetic:

I’ve Been Through Quite the Journey with Prayer this Summer

I’ve been wrestling with the question “how do you hear God”, and for the first time in my life, over the last six months, I’ve had such specific and dramatic answers to questions that it’s quite amazing. Sometimes we hear, “you can only grow in your faith through suffering”. I do think that suffering is a tool God uses, but I haven’t been suffering. I’ve just decided that I want more of Him. And I’ve been changing some of my daily routines, and it’s been awesome.

But as I’m praying and reading more, some quotes from some books are standing out to me. And I thought I’d share this one about “holy habits”.

I’m reading Mark Buchanan’s Your God Is Too Safe, and he makes this point: no one expects to be able to pick up a violin and play like a maestro without any practice. No one expects to be able to paint well without practice. But, he says:

Your God Is Too Safe: Rediscovering the Wonder of a God You Can't ControlWe honestly think that we ourselves and those around us should be proficient with spiritual power, moving and acting with agility and endurance, wisdom and purity, able to conquer long-established habits of sloth and rebelliousness, simply on the basis of our desire and effort and sincerity…

We have to train for the spiritual life…

Holy habits are that: the disciplines, the routines by which we stay alive and focused on Him. At first we choose them and carry them out; after a while they are part of who we are. And they carry us.

Holy habits–prayer, Bible reading, worship, church attendance–these are all crucial if we want more of God’s power in our lives.

I shared  yesterday how I’ve been taking prayer walks everyday now that my daughter is leaving home. She won’t be there to take walks with anymore. And I’m finding that time of intense prayer with God so necessary now.

Don’t Forget to Enter to Win the $100 Visa Card!

You can do so on this post right here, brought to you via Lean Cuisine.

And on Instagram…

Have a great weekend, everyone! I’ll be packing Katie up to take her to college. Think of me!



When your "momma" role is over

When Your Job As a Momma is Done (Almost!)

Next Monday we load up the last of Katie's things, help the piano movers steady the piano in the truck, and head out on the highway to drop her off at university. My job as a mom is done. My youngest child is leaving home. I know I am always a mom; my older daughter has needed lots of advice over the last few years as she's been gone, especially around her wedding. But I'm not a mom anymore. I'm an advisor. It is different. It's lovely, but different. I'm proud of my girls. They have … Read More...

The Happiness Reality Check--because your husband can't make you happy!

Wifey Wednesday: The Happiness Reality Check

Does the pursuit of happiness work in marriage? Can you find a husband who can complete you, who can be your best friend, who can make you happy for the rest of your life? That's one of the questions I ask in my new book, 9 Thoughts That Can Change Your Marriage. It launched last week, and I've been blown away by all the kind comments I've received and the great reviews! And I want to give a shout out to Gaye Christmus from Calm.Healthy.Sexy, who has been part of my blog tour. She's … Read More...

Life is short. Have an affair--with your husband! On Ashley Madison and having fun in marriage.

Top 10 Thoughts About the Ashley Madison Scandal

On Friday Johnny from Shine FM in Edmonton sent me a tweet: "You wanna call in to the morning show to talk about Ashley Madison?" I couldn't call on Friday but I did yesterday, and hosts Johnny and Hollie and I chatted about this huge, honking mess. Because it is a huge mess, isn't it? Tens of millions of Ashley Madison users' data is now online. You can even search email addresses yourself (though I won't link to where). Thousands of U.S. government emails are listed. Josh Duggar got found … Read More...

When your spouse hurts you: You don't have to feel ticked off! You can choose how to respond.

Reader Question: How Can I Love if My Spouse is Hurting Me?

How can I love my husband if he's hurting me? How can I love my spouse if my spouse completely ticks me off? Every Monday I like to put up a Reader Question and take a stab at answering it. Today's is quite a common one that most of you could have written: I know that sex is important in a marriage, but after spending the whole day picking up my husband's messes, dealing with all the chaos with my kids, and watching my husband totally oblivious to what's going on around him, I just want to … Read More...

Josh Duggar and Finding Peace

On Sexual Double Lives, Josh Duggar, and Peace

News broke Wednesday that Josh Duggar had been using the Ashley Madison adultery site to cheat on his wife. Yesterday Josh confessed, taking full responsibility and apologizing. I found myself so happy reading it. Sad at what that family is going through, yes. But happy because he is taking ownership, and that means that now, in the midst of this mess, even though it doesn't look like it--that family is closer to peace and redemption and healing than they have been in years. The mess is so … Read More...

My Daughter Reacts to Dental Surgery…

It's been a busy week for me! My new book, 9 Thoughts That Can Change Your Marriage, was released on Tuesday. And today I had to take both my girls in to get their wisdom teeth out, back to back. Here's a little video Katie made afterwards: So Becca and I do everything together. Including getting our wisdom teeth out! 😁 Becca reaaaaaally likes the drugs they gave us! 😂 (we vlogged a ton, should I post the whole video?😂) A video posted by Katie Gregoire🎶 (@katielizg) on Aug 20, 2015 … Read More...

Just Be Kind! Because your husband is your neighbor, too.

Just Be Kind: Why is That So Hard?

Just be kind. Why is that so hard? It's Wednesday, the day when we always talk marriage. I introduce a topic, and then marriage bloggers can link up their own marriage posts in the linky below. And it's launch week for my new book, 9 Thoughts That Can Change Your Marriage! I'm going to do some chat sessions on Facebook (if I can figure out how)!, some flash giveaways, and more. So stay tuned! And thanks for all who bought my book on launch day. It made such a difference ( more on that … Read More...

9 Thoughts That Can Change Your Marriage

I Want to Take YOU Out to Dinner!

Today's the big day! My new book 9 Thoughts That Can Change Your Marriage launches! I feel as if I've just had another baby. But this pregnancy was WAY longer. I've been working on the book for about two and a half years--wrote the proposal, then waited. Wrote the book, then waited. Edited the book, then waited. And now it's finally here!   But really the road's been even longer.  I've been struggling with a lot of the concepts in this book for years, because I'm saying … Read More...

Is a good marriage good enough?

Is Having a Good Marriage Good Enough?

Earlier this year, when talking with a young man about relationships, I told him my theory: From the emails I get and from talking to women online and at my events, I'd say that 60-70% of marriages are just fine. People enjoy each other. They're getting by. They're satisfied. About 15% are just lousy. They're almost broken and everybody is miserable. And then there are those 10-15% that are awesome. They're not just getting by--they're thriving! They can't wait to see each other at the end of … Read More...

My evening reading

Sometimes I Think My Voice is Weird

Do I have a weird voice? Whenever I hear myself talk I cringe. Especially when I hear myself laugh. My husband says my voice is lovely, but I really don't like it very much, which is rather inconvenient since I do so much speaking. But more on that in a minute--including something so cool (I was on Focus on the Family! Woo hoo!). First, though, here's what was big on the blog this week--so you don't miss anything! What's #1 at To Love, Honor and Vacuum I've been trying to switch … Read More...